


He's So Damn Mean

by sylc



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-07-25
Packaged: 2018-03-14 22:09:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3427355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sylc/pseuds/sylc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Makoto has a disastrous morning at university, all thanks to Rin, Haru & Sousuke. In that order.</p><p>Please leave kudos if you enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was all Rin’s fault as far as Makoto was concerned. On the one day on which he had a morning lecture to get to first thing, Rin just _had_ to message him to tell him he had slept in and couldn’t get to Haruka’s on time and could Makoto please go over and fish Haru out of the bath for him because their coaches would be furious if Haru was late today?

Makoto didn’t mind. Well, he did, but it was for Haru and of course he didn’t mind if it was for Haru, but last minute? He was already on the train to uni. So yes, he _did_ mind very much, but he couldn’t bring himself to say that. Because, well, it was Haru. And Rin was his friend too. So off he got, jumped onto another train that would take him to Haru’s district, and then off at _that_  stop to get out and run over to his childhood best friend’s flat.

He was sweating profusely by the time he got up to the second floor. He knocked and pressed the alarm, then - without bothering to wait for the answer that he knew probably wouldn’t come - tried the door and huffed frustratedly when he found it, as per usual, unlocked.

“Haru!” he called as he ducked inside the shadowy flat. “You left the door unlocked _again_!” It smelled like fried fish. He kicked off his shoes and ducked into the kitchen to open a window before heading over to the open bathroom door. “Haru! I’m already late so…”

He trailed off as he reached the bathroom door and saw the familiar mop of his friend’s black hair beneath the surface of the water. _He can’t hear me anyway._ He strode over and dipped his hand into the water to ruffle said head.

Haru stirred and his head and torso surged up, bright blue eyes swivelling to stare at him. “Don’t you have morning classes today?”

“Yeah. Rin sent me over because he thought you might be late yourself,” Makoto said, feeling his usual smile plastering itself over his face as per usual, despite himself feeling anything but cheerful. It must have looked more worn than usual because Haru then said:

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” _It’s not fine. My biology lecturer said he’d lock late attendees out of class._ Makoto held out his hand. “Come on.”

As he waited for Haru to dry himself and dress, he glanced at his watch. It was already 08:17. There was no way he was going to make the 08:30 class. He glanced at his friend and watched the sinewy limbs disappear behind a T-shirt and slacks. He missed his own musculature, which had shrunk quickly from lack of use over the summer, despite his attempts to go to the gym and weight train.

“I’m surprised you need encouragement to get to training,” he commented as he watched Haru head towards the kitchen. “Oi, don’t you have to be there by 09:00?”

“It’s fine,” Haru said quietly, opening the fridge and taking out a wrapped piece of… fish? Yes, mackerel. He began heating the grill. “It’s just orientation. There’s no pool until after lunch.”

Makoto noticed a slight inflection on the way he said _pool_. A little gasp in his breath. He smiled.

Haru glanced back at him. “Why did Rin not come today?”

“Ah. He said he overslept.” Makoto glanced at his watch. 08:19.

Haru snorted softly, and Makoto frowned. “Haru?”

“He’s got a partner.”

“Eh? Gou-chan?”

“No. _Rin_ has a girlfriend,” Haru corrected as he laid the fish onto the grill.

Ah. Makoto wasn’t sure what to say. _Lucky_ , was his only thought. He wished it was easy for himself to find a girlfriend. Of course, it would help if he was attracted to girls rather than guys. He used to be into Haru. But the guy was more like a brother to him now. “You think he spent the night with her?”

Haru gave a noncommittal little grunt, his eyes fixed on the quietly sizzling piece of fish. He used a pair of tongs to turn it over.

Makoto glanced at his watch again and felt his heart sink. It was already 08:24. Where had the last five minutes just gone?

“What’s her name?” he asked as he watched Haru fetch a plate. “How did they meet?”

“I’m not sure,” Haru said quietly. “She’s a women’s swim coach.”

He didn’t say any more and after quickly eating, they hurried to the train station where they separated on the stairs to go to their respective platforms. Makoto sighed when he saw that there was a queue for the train bound for Tokyo Uni. He would be fortunate if he made it before 09:00.

In the end, it was 08:58 when Makoto finally arrived at the door of the lecture theatre. Upon ducking inside, he cringed when all eyes in the crowded room swivelled to regard him. There were over 100 students in this class. The lecturer, an elderly man dressed immaculately in suit and tie, stared down his nose at him from the dais.

“Biology 1?” the professor queried. His voice could have cut ice.

“Ah. Yes. I’m so sorry, Sir,” Makoto apologised, bowing deeply.

“Your name?”

“Tachibana Makoto, Sir.”

“Sit outside.”

And that was that. Makoto found himself relegated to sit _outside_ the class on the concrete bench beside the adjoining courtyard garden. In a different context, he might have found it enjoyable to sit there in the dappled sunshine by the flowers. Currently, he wished he was back in bed. He had tried so damn hard to get into this university and he was already in trouble. And it was mostly his fault for not saying “no” to Rin.

He took out his textbook and began flipping through the chapter that according to the course directory, they were supposed to be currently covering some 20 metres away.

At 09:32, the door suddenly opened and students began filing out. Makoto looked sidelong at them, then looked away and back at the garden, feeling too awkward and inexplicably ashamed for sitting there. Someone like Haru or Nagisa would have refused to leave. Rin would have picked a fight with the lecturer. Even Rei would have stood his ground. Probably. But him? He wasn’t like that. He was just…

“You’ve got no fucking balls, man,” said a deep voice right in front of him.

Makoto started and looked up. “Eh?” Long legs, black jeans, an athletic torso, grey fitted T-shirt with broad muscular shoulders, and a denim vest. His heart did a flip flop in his chest, an inappropriate pool of heat sinking deep into his lower abdomen. By the time his eyes reached the other guy’s face, he was flushing, and that flush only grew worse when he realised that he recognised the face at the top. “Yama… Yamazaki-san, right?”

The other guy blinked. “Yeah,” he said, and scowled down at him. “I thought I recognised you the other day in class, but I wasn’t sure if it was you. But then you blurted out your name so loudly today I think everyone knows who the slacker is now.”

“Ah.” Makoto felt like his face had caught alight. _That’s so damn mean._ “I haven’t been-been late before,” he pointed out weakly.

“Anyway,” Yamazaki said, ploughing ahead, “you can copy my notes. They’re shit, but better than nothing.”

“Er… you don’t have to…”

“Why? You got someone else you know here?” Yamazaki asked bluntly. He stared at Makoto, who was still blushing and feeling utterly humiliated. “Yeah, I thought so.” He sighed. “Come on. You’re free until Physiotherapy at 11, right? Hang out with me for a bit.”

“I-I have to speak to the lecturer.” _How does he know I have Physiotherapy 1? Are we doing the same degree?_

“He’s already left,” Yamazaki said.

“Eh?” Makoto rose and went over to the door of the lecture theatre to look inside. Sure enough, the hall was deserted. He turned back around to stare confusedly at the other teen. “But he told me to wait.”

Yamazaki stared back at him, his expression disdainful. “No. He told you to ‘sit outside’. And you did. Like a damn fucking wuss.”

“I-I’m not!” _What the hell is with this guy’s attitude? No wonder Haru won't hang out with him._

“Yeah?” Yamazaki said, picking up Makoto’s backpack from the bench with his left hand and hefting it over his left shoulder. His own backpack, a crossbody messenger, was already slung across his body. “Well, that’s just what Rin said. Make me think otherwise, Pretty Boy.” Then, with the faintest of smirks, he turned and began heading off in the direction of the nearby cafeteria.

Having no other option, Makoto hurried after him. _Pretty Boy?_ “How’s your shoulder?” he ventured, drawing alongside the taller guy. He glanced sidelong at him and felt himself flush when he realised that he really _really_ liked what he saw. Yamazaki had such a strong, chiselled face. Smooth skin, intent dark eyes, and surprisingly long lashes. Pity about the personality.

Yamazaki, to his relief, didn’t look at him, but straight ahead, paying attention to the gaggles of students milling on the pathways. Not that he needed to bother; everyone parted like a wave as they approached, often with admiring (from the females) or envying (from the males) looks. “It’s fine,” he said gruffly.

“But you’re not competing,” Makoto stated. _Didn’t Rin say that Yamazaki was going to compete again?_

“Not this year. I’m having another arthroscope next month; then it depends on what they find and what they want to do about it,” Yamazaki said quietly.

“You seem pretty calm about it,” Makoto remarked. He remembered hearing from Gou about loud fights between Rin and Yamazaki and Rin being in tears only a few months ago. _Although Rin cries about a lot of things. He probably gets called a ‘wuss’ by this guy too._

“I’m not. I’m fucking annoyed about it,” Yamazaki said curtly, finally shooting him an irritated look. “But I can’t do anything about it besides wear the stabiliser and lightly exercise it. There’s no point me chucking a wobbly about it.”

“I… I wouldn’t know how I’d feel if I was in your position,” Makoto said. “But it sucks. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah. Well, it’s not your problem,” Yamazaki growled. “Now stop talking about it.”

_Maybe that’s what Rin does; keeps pushing the subject._

“Sorry.”

“And don’t apologise,” Yamazaki added curtly. They had arrived at the cafeteria. He gestured at the waitress, holding up two fingers, and giving her a curt nod of acknowledgement when she bowed and smilingly waved them towards a table for two by the window. Yamazaki set Makoto’s backpack down on one of the chairs, then took off his messenger and sank into the seat opposite. “Coffee, please. Flat white, no sugar,” he told the waitress, then looked expectantly at Makoto. So did the waitress.

Makoto blushed under the scrutiny. _What do I want? I don’t really like coffee._ “Ah… the same for me,” he said awkwardly. He put his backpack onto the ground and sat down. “Can I look at your notes?” he asked.

“Sure.” Yamazaki opened his bag and rummaged around in it before pulling out a crumpled looking notebook. Makoto caught a glimpse of squashed pieces of paper, tissues, an old gum packet, a crumpled T-shirt, and a balled up navy piece of cloth with velcro attached to it… _Is that the stabiliser?_ The notebook was set on the table between them and Makoto reached for it.

“Why were you late anyway?” Yamazaki asked.

“Ah. I went to get Haru up,” Makoto explained as he tugged the book towards him. Yamazaki’s brow knitted. “Nanase- _san_ ,” he clarified.

“I know that,” Yamazaki said. “Is he alright?”

Oh. Makoto had assumed that because Rin apparently told Yamazaki about most aspects of the old Iwatobi gang, that he knew _everything_ about their weird habits. “Yeah. Haru isn’t a morning person unless there’s a pool involved,” he said. _I won’t mention that getting Haru up means getting him out of the bath._ _That’d be too weird._

Yamazaki’s bemused expression didn’t change. “Isn’t there a pool involved every day for him now?” he questioned.

“It’s orientation in the morning currently,” Makoto explained.

Yamazaki just stared at him for a long moment. Finally, he shook his head. “You should ask Rin to get him up,” he said finally. “At least on this day of the week. He lives around the corner from Nanase. Two blocks, I’d say.”

Makoto smiled. “Rin was supposed to get him up today,” he said. “But he said he slept in and would be late.” _Because he has a girlfriend, apparently. Does Yamazaki know anything more?_

“That doesn’t make sense. Rin never sleeps in unless he’s hung over. Unless you live even closer to Nanase.” Black eyes narrowed at him. “Do you?”

“I don’t,” Makoto said, flushing again under the scrutiny. _So apparently Yamazaki doesn’t know anything about this girlfriend._ “I live three stops away.”

“Yeah, that doesn’t make sense,” Yamazaki said. He shrugged. “Guess he’s got something else going on.”

Makoto smiled weakly and, not knowing what else to talk about, opened the notebook and began turning the pages. He was unsurprised by how messy Yamazaki’s handwriting was, but a little surprised by how thorough the notes were. From the impressions of Yamazaki that he had gathered from Haru and Rin, Yamazaki was a typical book-averse jock with a stubborn attitude and a foul mouth. Apparently that wasn’t entirely the case.

“Sorry about the handwriting,” Yamazaki said. He folded his hands behind his head and leaned back in his chair. “I wasn’t writing for show.”

“Ah, no-no, it’s fine,” Makoto said, looking up at him and smiling shyly. _God, this feels so awkward!_ He had to force himself not to stare at the outline of the other boy’s muscles through his shirt, and keep his gaze focussed on his face. He was aware that he was blushing again.

Their coffees suddenly arrived, startling Makoto who stammered his thanks. Yamazaki flashed the girl a smile as he thanked her and Makoto noticed the girl’s eyes linger on Yamazaki just those few extra seconds longer before she squeaked “I hope you enjoy your drinks,” and scurried away.

“How…”

“Huh?” Yamazaki’s gaze had been resting on the girl’s retreating back, an amused smile on his lips. Now it flicked back to him. “What?”

“What kind of training do you do?” Makoto asked. “You’re not swimming currently, are you?”

“Mostly weights,” Yamazaki said. “I do a bit of jogging too. Why?”

“You just…” _There’s no other way to say it, really._ “…look really good. And-And I haven’t been able to swim so much recently so I’m not as fit as I used to be.”

Yamazaki stared at him for a few moments. Then his gaze dropped to the notebook. “Are you going to copy that?”

 _He just brushed me off._ “Ah… yes,” Makoto hurriedly turned and bent to open his backpack. He was so flustered that he knocked his drink with his elbow, and with a clatter and crash, he suddenly had a lap full of hot coffee and broken crockery at his feet.

“Shit!” Yamazaki was suddenly at his side, dragging him out of his chair. “What a klutz! Come on.” He shouldered his messenger bag and took out his wallet to pull out a 1000 yen bill and a few coins, which he tossed onto the table. Then he shoved his notebook back into it, picked up Makoto’s backpack, and then grabbed him by the arm. “Get up.”

Makoto yelped and let himself be pulled out of the chair and away to the nearest bathrooms with showers. His face was burning with embarrassment. The stares from the students they passed only made him feel more mortified. Once there, Yamazaki only paused long enough to kick off his shoes in the locker area. As soon as Makoto had done likewise, the taller guy dragged him into the communal shower area. Only then did he finally let go of him, and that was to go over to the faucet and turn it on. “Get undressed,” he ordered, not looking at him.

“It’s-it’s really not-not that…”

Yamazaki turned and glared at him. Really _glared_ at him. Suddenly Makoto understood what Haru had meant when he had said that Yamazaki had threatened him once. The guy was really scary when he was angry. And this was when he didn’t look about to throw a punch. “Get. Undressed.”

Makoto hurriedly undid his belt and pushed down his pants, taking off his socks too as he bent down and shoved them off his feet. Then he took off his tee and, leaving his briefs on, stepped under the cold water, shoulders hunched in embarrassment. He glanced around and relaxed slightly when he realised that it was only them in the bathroom. Then he looked at Yamazaki and flushed when he realised that the guy was leaning against the shower wall, hands shoved in his jean pockets, and looking at him. Not at his face. At his body. Quite openly. If he wasn’t feeling so humiliated and also if his groin wasn’t throbbing so much initially from the burn and now just shrunken and numb from the freezing cold water, he’d be embarrassed for an entirely different reason right now.

“W-W-What is it?” Makoto was seriously wondering if this day could be any more traumatic for him.

“You’re right,” Yamazaki said, looking up at his face. “You’re not as well defined as you were at Nationals. Your back was fucking shredded then.”

“O-Oh.”

“You can take off your briefs, by the way. I don’t care. That’s where most of the coffee went.”

 _Well I care!_ Makoto tried not to think of the other boy’s admission that he had observed his crotch. _Well of course he had! And he went to a swimming academy. He probably saw other guys’ dicks all the time._

“You probably should, actually.”

“A-Ah.” _Should I? I suppose I really should. It does hurt._ Shoulders hunched, Makoto looped his thumbs below the elastic waist of the undergarment and, with a small breath, pushed them down and stepped out of them. He turned his back on Yamazaki and, cupping his penis and balls - which were shrivelled from the cold - examined them. Thankfully, they didn’t look reddened at all. They felt tender, though.

“Can I see?”

“No!” Makoto squawked, turning bright red despite the freezing shower. He coughed, and cleared his throat. Glancing back, he saw Yamazaki staring at him, eyes slightly wide in obvious confusion. _Great! I’ve suddenly made this a huge issue._

And then Yamazaki suddenly blushed and looked away. “Jeez. I didn’t mean it in a _weird_ way,” he said gruffly. “You just seemed so fucking hopeless.”

“I have younger siblings!” Makoto said crossly, too embarrassed himself to take any delight in seeing Yamazaki discomfited. “I know how to look after a burn.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Yamazaki said, taking his hands out of his pockets and holding them up. “Well just stay under there for a bit. I’ll be waiting out in the locker room.” He turned, then halted. “Oh, wait. I have my gym shorts here. You can wear them.” He flipped open the top of his bag and took out a balled up garment, which he tossed on top of Makoto’s discarded T-shirt. Then he turned and strode out.

Makoto stayed under the shower for about twenty minutes, remembering that figure from a guide that his parents kept on the fridge about first aid. Then he did a quick nudie run to fetch a towel from the cupboard across from the shower. Then he finally got dressed. He felt a bit weird about going commando, especially in someone else’s shorts and especially in Yamazaki’s shorts, but there wasn’t anything else for it. The draw string waisted shorts were loose on him, which was a small blessing. He rinsed out his pants and briefs, then squeezed the water out of them. Wrapping them in the towel, he finally padded out to the locker area.

Yamazaki was sitting on one of the benches, staring at his phone. He glanced up when Makoto entered. “Yo. Feel better?” the taller boy asked.

“Yeah.” Makoto flushed. “Sorry. Thanks for… the shorts. And the-the coffee.”

“You’re welcome.” Yamazaki snorted. “For the shorts, anyway. Come on. Let’s photocopy those notes and get to class.”

They went quietly to the library where Makoto dutifully copied Yamazaki’s notes in the photocopier. Then they trooped off to the physiotherapy lecture room. They were fifteen minutes early and the hall was almost empty. Yamazaki went to one of the side chairs near the back and, gauging that given the other guy was still hanging around him despite him repeatedly embarrassing himself that morning, Makoto took the seat beside him.

“You can call me Sousuke, by the way,” Yamazaki said suddenly, breaking the silence.

“Ah. Makoto,” Makoto said, smiling. “Although most of the Iwatobi gang… and Rin too… sometimes… call me Mako- _chan_ , so that’s okay too.”

Sousuke shot him a sidelong look. Makoto wasn’t quite sure how to interpret it. _Was what I said weird?_

“Do you _want_ me to call you Mako- _chan_?”

“Ah. I don’t… mind.”

“I think I’ll just stick with Makoto for now, if you don’t mind. I’m not really part of the gang.”

“Yes-Yes. Of course that’s fine. Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.” Makoto could feel himself blushing again. _Damn it!_

“Jeez. And stop apologising too.”

“Sorry!” Makoto was now bright red. Again! The fact that Sousuke was staring at him in mild irritation wasn’t helping him at all.

Sousuke’s eyes narrowed slightly, and then the guy sighed and, scowling, slid down in his chair slightly. There was a brief silence. Makoto looked at the blank projector screen at the front of the room. He glanced at his watch. 10:49. Eleven minutes.

“You know…” Sousuke said suddenly, his voice gruff and low.

“Hm?” Makoto glanced nervously at him.

The other guy glanced at him and seemed about to say something, and then hesitated, and then pulled his mobile phone out of his pocket. “I don’t have your phone number,” he said finally. He flipped open the device. “What is it?”


	2. Chapter 2

_“What is it?”_ Haru’s voice, so flat and impassive, made his mood even harder to gauge over the phone because Makoto couldn’t also see his face. He supposed he should be glad that Haru even carried his phone around with him nowadays, unlike in high school.

“About dinner tonight. You said that Rin was coming too, right? I was wondering… if… Sousuke could come.”

A pause. _“Yamazaki-san?_ ” Haru asked finally.

“Uh… yeah.”

There was another pause. Makoto glanced sidelong at Sousuke, who was sitting with legs sprawled lazily apart on the bench outside the library, hands lax in his lap, his bag at his side, watching him without expression. Makoto smiled slightly. Sousuke raised his eyebrows as if to say: _Why are you smiling at me?_ Flushing, and finding the temptation of letting his gaze drop to stare at the other guy’s body - specifically his crotch - way too strong, Makoto deliberately looked away and focussed on the wall beside the library’s glass doors. _Why is he sitting with his legs apart? I mean… it’s perfectly normal, but why am I making an issue out of him doing something so normal?_ He stared blankly at the giant metallic word - LIBRARY - that was shining brightly in the late afternoon sunlight.

Then he realised that he hadn’t heard a response from Haru.

“Uh… Haru?” he prompted.

_“Yeah. It’s fine. How do you know Yamazaki?”_

“We-We’re studying the same degree: physiotherapy. We share the same classes. Not tutorials, but…” _Why am I justifying myself to Haru? Why does he need to know that we’re not in the same tutorials? Sousuke just messaged me earlier to say he was in the library so we met up after my tute…_ “Anyway, we bumped into each other yesterday. He’s nice.” He glanced at Sousuke who was still doing the raised eyebrows thing at him. _Did he hear that? Me say ‘he’s nice’? Must have._ Makoto felt his flush deepen.

_“I don’t mind.”_

“Okay, cool. We’ll see you at seven at Chubby Bowl in the city, then. How was training?”

_“Good.”_

“That’s it? Just good?”

_“Yeah.”_ Haru wasn’t talkative at the best of times. Makoto smiled bracingly.

“Okay. Well, we’ll see you in a bit, then. Bye.”

_“Bye.”_

Makoto flipped his phone shut and looked back at Sousuke who had taken his own phone out of his pocket and was staring at it. “He said it’s cool,” he said. “Did you hear back from Rin?”

“Nah.” Sousuke shut his own phone and shoved it back into his pocket. “Seven, right? I might do some more study before I head over.” He rose.

“Ah.” Makoto flushed when Sousuke’s gaze flicked back to him. “I… I was going to do the same. Study in the library, I mean,” he stammered. “Do you want to… study together?” _I sound so pathetic._

“Sure.” Sousuke hesitated, then - his eyes softening suddenly - said, “How’s the burn?”

“Ah! …Fine.” Makoto lowered his eyes. Okay, now he was bright red again. He peeked up at Sousuke and noticed that the other guy was no longer looking at him, but staring intently at the glass doors. _This is awkward. What am I supposed to say? Should I tell him there’s no damage? No! That’s weird. That it doesn’t hurt anymore? No, that’s also no good._ “Thank… thank you for helping me yesterday,” he settled on finally.

“Y-Yeah. It’s no problem,” Sousuke said gruffly. He turned away. “Come on.”

Makoto quietly followed him into the library and down the stairs to the quiet study area. Despite consecutive embarrassments in front of the other guy yesterday morning, he was really glad that he knew _someone_ here. Tokyo in general was kind of scary and the university was no better. Sousuke seemed at ease, though, despite the crowds. Makoto wondered if he had come to Tokyo to train during his middle and high school years. Hadn’t he ranked in the top ten in Japan at one time then? That kind of level would have warranted at least a few trips to the capital. Either way, he had noticed how Sousuke didn’t seem at all fazed by the city’s stifling crowds, constant noises, or strange smells.

Sousuke sat down at a deserted table and pulled out his anatomy textbook, a notebook, and mechanical pencil. Makoto took the adjacent seat and did the same. He flipped open his book to the most recently marked page, picked up his pencil and began taking notes. When he glanced at his companion a few minutes later, he noticed Sousuke had followed suit. It was kind of weird to see the other boy working quietly beside him, so much large, beautiful, encapsulated strength… so much dormant power focussed on the small, delicate task of writing with a small pencil on a piece of paper. Today the guy was wearing a long sleeved charcoal sweatshirt, and it perfectly outlined his enormous shoulders and arms. Those intent eyes fixed on such small printed text, that tiny purse to those lips. It was almost criminal to see such a guy obliged to sit still.

Makoto felt his mouth go dry, a by now familiar warm sensation clamping down deep inside his lower abdomen.

Sousuke glanced at him then, his gaze initially disinterested, then frowning when he met Makoto’s eyes. “You alright?”

Makoto blushed right down to his neck. “Fine!” he squeaked. He ducked his head and resumed his notetaking, this time furiously. _Shit!_

Sousuke snorted and then fell silent. When Makoto next dared to look at him, the other guy was writing again, his eyes heavy lidded, the long lashes almost obscuring his pupils.

_Damn. I really am into him._ Makoto swallowed and hurriedly looked back at his textbook. He had to force himself to concentrate. There had been moments yesterday… and today too, by virtue of the fact that this guy was still willing to smile at and greet him and hang around with him, when he had thought that Sousuke wasn’t _averse_ to him and might even _like_ him, but _friendly like_ and _sexual like_ were two very different things. And Makoto didn’t want to risk driving him away by pushing anymore limits than he already had, however circumstantial those episodes may have been. He didn’t have any friends here except for Sousuke as of yet. Blatantly coming onto the guy wasn’t the right thing to do. Especially given he didn’t really know _how_ to come onto anyone.

“You do know that Nanase- _san_ and I aren’t friends, right?” Sousuke said suddenly.

“Eh?” Makoto looked at him in surprise. “Y-Yeah,” he replied. “I’m aware that you’ve had… disagreements.”

“Just one,” Sousuke said quietly. “But we haven’t spoken since.”

“He said it’s okay for you to come tonight, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“I’m just saying that he might be inviting me because _you_ asked him, that’s all.”

“You think so?” Makoto hesitated. Then he smiled. _That’s probably the case, but even so…_ “I don’t really know what happened between you guys. It was about Rin, right? So it’s probably okay. Especially as Rin is going to be there too.”

Sousuke blinked. Then he smiled. Makoto stared at the expression, struck by its amiability. “About Rin. Well, that’s true at least,” the other guy remarked. “Damn crybaby.” He looked down at his notes and tapped the eraser end of his pencil against the paper. Once. Twice. “I just wanted to check that you know where Nanase and I stand.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

They continued studying until just after six, Makoto occasionally… okay, _frequently_ … stealing glances at the huge hunk of taut muscle sitting hunched over the table beside him. If Sousuke noticed his attention, the guy didn’t comment. He seemed pretty focussed on his note-taking, though.

The library was pretty empty by the time Makoto noticed that six o’clock had come and gone. He stretched in his chair, raising a hand to cover his yawn. He had gone to wake up Haru this morning too and he hadn’t gone back to bed after so he was pretty tired. He had gone to bed late too; he had been so paranoid about getting badly burned from being scalded yesterday that he had stayed up until after midnight applying burn relief cream to his genitals and inner thighs every two hours. He had suspected it was probably over kill at the time, and he knew today that he was definitely okay given the awkward, but certainly not painful snugness in his briefs since he had met with Sousuke outside the library that afternoon.

_I’ve been half-hard for two hours now. Just because of him. This is really awkward. I suppose I should be glad I don’t share any tutorials with him._

“Time to go?” Sousuke asked.

Makoto looked at him. The other guy was eyeing him attentively. He laughed awkwardly, unable to help himself from flushing under the other guy’s regard. “Yeah. The train takes about half an hour so we should probably leave now. We might even be late, actually. Sorry.”

Sousuke eyed him a few seconds longer, no expression in his eyes. Then he nodded curtly. “Right,” he said, and looked away to begin shoving his books into his bag.

_Shit._ Makoto focussed on packing up his own belongings, noting vaguely how much neater he was at packing his books into his backpack than the other guy. _He’s noticed the weirdness. Definitely. Hasn’t he? Nothing’s been said. But he’d call me on it, wouldn’t he? He’s that kind of guy… kind of person, because some girls are like that too. Ball-sy. Straightforward. Like Gou._

“Oi, Tachibana, you spacing out or what?” Sousuke’s voice broke through his scattered thoughts. Makoto stared up at the other boy, who was standing over him, messenger bag already slung around his broad torso, staring down at him with a frown.

“Eh? Sorry!” Makoto shot up and hurriedly zipped his bag shut. Sousuke huffed and turned away to begin walking towards the stairs. Before following him, Makoto sneaked a quick peek downwards to check that his downstairs was presentably discreet. Thankfully, he wasn’t wearing tight jeans. Everything looked hidden. Relieved, he shouldered his backpack and hurried after Sousuke who was already on the stairwell and making his way up, two steps at a time, his long legs making it look like he was walking normally. Makoto suppressed a little gasp as he found his gaze settling on the other guy’s backside. He closed his eyes tightly.

_And now we’ve got to catch a train together. In peak hour. In crushing standing room only. Fuck my life._

Makoto was so red by the time he caught up to Sousuke at the door of the library that the other guy, on looking at him, did a double take and then asked him seriously, “Are you okay?”

“F-Fine.”

“Are you sure? You’re really red,” Sousuke remarked, frowning at him. He bent slightly to look him more fully in the face and pulled back slightly, eyes widening in surprise, when Makoto hurriedly flung up his outstretched right hand between their faces.

“It’s-It’s fine. I just… I just felt hot for a bit,” he half-lied, staring at the floor. _Think of something else. The biology lecturer. The quiz next week. Ran and Ren. Tutorial assignments._ He swallowed.

“What’s with the hand?” Sousuke grumbled, grabbing him by the wrist. “Come on. You’re going to make us late for the dinner _you_ arranged.” Makoto yelped when he suddenly found himself being dragged off in the direction of the train station. The other guy’s stride was slightly longer than his own, uncomfortably so. Quicker too.

“Oi, Sousuke,” he protested, as they passed a group of students who stared at them. He twisted his wrist, but the other guy’s grip just tightened on his wrist. “Sousuke!”

“Shut up!” Sousuke growled from in front of him. Makoto couldn’t see his expression, but he imagined it was twisted into a scowl. “We’re late. You’re fluffing about. Just hurry up.”

Makoto flushed and lowered his eyes as they passed another staring group. Jogging slightly, he finally, _finally!_ caught up with him. _How the hell is he so much fitter than me after only a few months? Damn his long legs. Damn his exercise routine._

“You can let go now,” he muttered, staring resolutely in front of them and trying to ignore the stares that they were _still_ garnering from the people they passed. “This is awkward.”

“You think you constantly blushing in front of me _isn’t_ awkward for me?” Sousuke replied. Makoto blinked.

_Eh? Eeeeh?_ He sneaked a sidelong look at Sousuke, but the other guy wasn’t looking at him, instead gazing straight ahead. He lowered his eyes. Sousuke was _still_ holding his arm.

“You… are you going to hold my hand all the way to the train?” he asked awkwardly as they reached the end of the university block and approached the zebra crossing that led towards the train station. It was more crowded here. Fewer students. More older people. More people who glanced at them, specifically at their joined limbs.

“I’m holding your _wrist_.”

“Ten centimetres,” Makoto retorted. He blinked when Sousuke suddenly halted at the side of the crossing and turned to look down at Makoto’s wrist and his hand with narrowed eyes. He wasn’t smiling. Abruptly, he opened his hand a bit and, sliding it down, clasped Makoto’s palm. His fingers were long and broad, the ends callused. His skin felt warm and dry. A shock of sensation ran up Makoto’s arm at the touch.

_What? Oh. God._

“Better?” Sousuke asked gruffly as he turned away. Makoto yelped as he was pulled after him again.

“No!” he protested as they hurried across the zebra crossing. “It’s worse!”

A soft snort. “Too bad.” _Is he laughing at me?_

They hurried down the opposite pavement, down another street, and into the station. A train was just drawing in on the city-bound track and Sousuke pulled him onto it and finally, _finally_ let go of his hand. Surprisingly, it wasn’t as crowded as Makoto had feared and there were even a few seats available, but none of those seats were together. Sousuke grabbed onto one of the vertical metal rails and Makoto held onto the overhead one beside him. He turned his body slightly towards the other guy, acutely aware that he was still nursing a half-hard erection, but more reluctant for other passengers to notice it than he was for Sousuke. The guy wasn’t likely to look straight down his front from beside him anyway. Not that the close proximity to his body’s source of interest was helping his condition any. He glanced up at the other boy’s face, but Sousuke wasn’t looking at him and instead staring absently at something in the aisle. Makoto turned his head and stared out of the window at the view.

After a few stops, he glanced at his watch. 18:53. Okay, they were probably going to be late. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and began tapping out a message to Haru.

_Sorry. Running fifteen minutes late._

“Five,” Sousuke said quietly in his low voice.

Makoto looked at him in surprise. The guy was looking over his shoulder at the screen of his phone, his expression slightly bored. “It’s still four more stops and then we have to walk there,” he said.

“There’s a back way. We can cut through the old temple.” Sousuke blinked when Makoto just stared at him. “What? Did I say something wrong?”

“N-No.” _Yes._

“You’re kind of pale.”

Makoto looked back at his phone. He could feel a bead of cold sweat slowly creeping down his back. “Fifteen minutes,” he said as he finished and pressed ‘send’ on the text. “I don’t like that route.”

Sousuke sighed. “Whatever, man.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scaredy-cat Makoto.

“Yeah, I remember the Mikoshiba brothers,” Makoto said eagerly. “I didn’t know they had an older sister, though.” _That’s so funny to think about. Does she have ginger hair too? Is she as energetic as them?_

During the course of dinner, the subject of Rin’s girlfriend had come up and Rin had, after hedging around the subject for a bit, finally become talkative about the woman that he had apparently been seeing for a month or so now.

“Haha, it’s still early days,” the red head said with a nervous grin, raising his right hand and rubbing the back of his neck with the palm. His gaze flicked quickly around the table at them, then down to stare at the demolished remains of his beef bowl. “But yeah, I suppose we’re a couple now.”

Makoto beamed. He wasn’t used to seeing Rin awkward and hesitant. It was kind of cute. He glanced at Sousuke, who was sitting beside Rin. The guy was leaning slightly back in his chair with his arms folded. His eyes were narrowed slightly as they regarded Rin, but there was a small smile on his face. _Is this the first time Sousuke has heard of Rin’s girlfriend too?_

Beside Makoto, Haru - who hadn’t remarked on Rin’s announcement - suddenly stirred and raised his chopsticks to resume attending to his mackerel, salad and rice dish. He had been the last to receive his meal and start eating, and so was the last to finish as well. Makoto watched him for a few moments, then looked back at Rin and blinked when he noticed that Rin was also watching Haru eat, a small frown on the red head’s face.

“Well, good luck,” Sousuke said suddenly. Rin stirred and looked at the taller guy. He grinned toothily.

“Yeah, thanks! Although… actually, …I had a question for you,” Rin added, now looking slightly abashed.

Sousuke’s brow rose. “Yeah?”

“About sex.”

Makoto stilled. Beside him, he noticed Haru do the same, the chopsticks and the lettuce they held stopping in mid air, half way between his plate and his mouth.

“Yeah?” Sousuke repeated.

“Am _I_ supposed to carry the condoms? Or is she?”

Sousuke snorted. “Jeez, you’re fucking green,” he muttered under his breath.

Rin flushed. “Hey, it’s a serious question.” He squirmed when Sousuke scowled and reached out to push down his head and ruffle his lanky red hair. Rin’s hands flew up to push him away. “Oi! Just because I’m not a damn lady killer like _you_!”

 _Lady killer? Sousuke is…?_ Makoto felt his face fall before he could hide his expression. _He’s straight?_ Thankfully, none of his dining companions were looking at him.

Sousuke released Rin and, leaning back in his chair, folded his arms again and sighed loudly. “It’s _your_ junk, you idiot,” he muttered. “Always carry rubbers if you’re planning… or hoping on doing it.”

“But she’s on the pill.”

“STIs, man,” Sousuke scowled. “And the pill’s not 100% effective. Fucking hell, you’re an accident waiting to happen.”

“Fuck off,” Rin muttered, scowling now as well.

“Doesn’t it decrease sensation?” asked Haru suddenly. His calm, low tone carried clearly through the terse atmosphere of the table.

Makoto stared at his friend. As did Rin _and_ Sousuke. _What? Haru’s weighing in now? On condoms? Since when has Haru been thinking seriously about sex?_ From the expressions on Rin and Sousuke’s faces, they were thinking something similar.

Sousuke stared thoughtfully at Haru for a few moments longer. Then he tilted his head. “Yes … but that’s not always a bad thing,” he said finally. “It can help you last longer… and I find it helps the mood. I dated a girl once who was a bit scatterbrained and used to forget to take her pill… sex was better when we used rubbers.” He shrugged.

There was a brief silence.

“So…” Rin said awkwardly, “…which condoms do you like?”

“There’s a few. I have a ribbed here.” Sousuke leaned forward and slipped his wallet out of his back pocket. He unfolded it and Makoto saw a flash of shiny blue plastic between the guy’s fingers as he removed an item and passed it to Rin who took it and, holding it down below the level of the table, stared at it. “You can take it. I always carry a couple.”

“Sometimes I hate you so much,” Rin muttered, closing his hand on the condom and stuffing it into the pocket of his jacket. He pushed his hair out of his eyes, then looked across the table at Makoto and Haru. “What about you guys? What do you use?”

Makoto stared blankly back at him. _What does he expect me to say? I’ve never had sex._ Beside him, Haru serenely resumed eating.

“Jeez,” Rin said, eyes wide. “I figured one of you was probably still a virgin, but _both_ of you? Iwatobi was co-ed, for God’s sake!”

Awkwardly, Makoto lowered his eyes and stared at Haru’s emptying plate. Only two more pieces of mackerel to go. Then one. Then just that last piece of cucumber. And then that was gone too.

Abruptly, Haru rose and pushed back his chair. “Let’s go,” he said calmly, and without waiting for a response, he turned and went over to the cashier to pay for his meal. His face was  - as per usual - expressionless, but Makoto could tell from the abrupt way in which Haru had left the conversation and the table, that Rin had struck a chord.

So, apparently, could Rin, because the red head suddenly sighed and rose to head after Haru. Makoto watched the guy take his wallet out of his pocket as he approached the counter and, slinging his arm around Haru’s shoulders, started to chat cheerily to the waitress behind the counter.

Haru finished paying. Then it was Rin’s turn. And then, also with a sigh, Sousuke pushed back his chair with a squeak and rose to his towering height to stride over and join them, his expression indifferent. Makoto stood and walked over also, trying not to think too much about how disappointed he was at the thought of Sousuke having sex with others… particularly with women.

_It’s not a surprise, though. Look at the guy. He looks incredible. People stare at him wherever he goes. The waitress is eyeing him up right now._

The others moved outside whilst he was paying. By the time he joined them, he realised - with a jolt of dismay - that they were wandering towards the shortcut route to the train station… via the old temple.

 _Even Haru. Damn._ But in Haru’s defence, his childhood friend - the only one of the group who knew the extent of Makoto’s weird phobias - was currently distracted by Rin’s arm around his shoulders and cheerful chattering about something to do with their Australian adventures.

Makoto headed after them, his heart sinking as they approached the steep, narrow, creaky, and poorly lit wooden stairwell that led down to the dilapidated temple. Haru went first, ushered by Rin, who followed him closely, one hand on the rail, the other in the pocket of his jacket, still talking loudly. Then went Sousuke, bouncing lightly on his feet, his body language relaxed.

Makoto waited until there were a couple of metres between him and Sousuke, and then - grabbing both of the rails - and deliberately not looking down, slowly eased himself forward and downwards.

 _One step at a time. One step at a time,_ he chanted silently to himself, forcing himself only to glance down in order to check where he was stepping, and not at the gaps between the steps. He could feel his heart already racing in his chest and he felt dizzy. His fingers felt numb on the cold metal rails. The cold sweat was forming on his back again, and he felt queasy.

_One step at a time. One step at a time._

He looked ahead to where Haru and Rin had already arrived at the base of the stairwell and were walking under one of the shrine’s arches, some twenty or so steps away from where he was standing clutching the rails like a madman. Rin’s arm was back around Haru’s shoulders. Makoto couldn’t hear what Rin was saying anymore.

He paused and, taking in a deep gulp of air, closed his eyes. The cool breeze up here, at least, was some relief.

The stairs suddenly vibrated. Someone was coming up. Opening his eyes, he suddenly found himself face to face with Sousuke, who had turned around whilst Makoto had been distracted, and was heading back up towards him. Makoto stared at him.

 _Shit! He’s not heading_ past _me, is he?_ Would he have to let go of one of the rails?

Sousuke drew nearer, finally stopping a couple of steps below him. The stairs were so steep that the other guy’s head only reached up to his middle. Sousuke frowned up at him. “Oi. You okay?”

“Y-Yeah.” Makoto looked past him to the street below, but Haru and Rin had disappeared out of sight beyond the temple’s inner gates. _Have they forgotten about us? Where are they?_

“You sure?” Sousuke’s low voice dragged his attention back to his current predicament. Makoto stared at the guy’s dark eyes and concerned expression. He could feel himself trembling slightly. He fancied his heart was trying to beat itself out of his chest. He knew his face was probably grey. He knew what he looked like when he was shit scared. He had been teased with mirrors enough times in the past. Even by Ran and Ren. There was no point denying it.

“No,” he admitted. “I-I don’t like heights.” _Or dark roads. Or haunted old temples._ Even if he had consented to come this way from the train station to Chubby Bowl, they would have been late. Later, probably. The only reason he was here now was because of peer pressure and because Haru had apparently forgotten about him enough to not speak up in defence of taking the well lit and flatter route to the station.

“Can I help?”

“No.” Makoto clipped. Pushing thoughts of the other guy out of his mind, he took a deep breath and looked down at his feet. He heaved himself down to the next step.

_One step at a time._

And then the next step.

_One step at a time._

And then the next.

He paused as he felt another wave of dizziness come over him. Closing his eyes, he took a few more deep breaths, trying to make sure that they were taken deep and slow. He shivered slightly as another breeze gusted past him, making him acutely aware of the drying cold sweat on his back.

He could hear a siren in the far distance. Opening his eyes, he resumed his painful slow descent.

“Are you sure I can’t help?” he heard Sousuke ask quietly from somewhere a few metres in front of him.

“I’m sure…” Makoto swallowed. “Where are Rin and Haru?”

“They went ahead. They wanted to catch the 9 o’clock train back.”

_They’ve left me._

_No. They’ve left us._

“Where… Where do you live?” Makoto asked, the thought only just occurring to him that he didn’t know where Sousuke lived. _Doesn’t he have a train to catch too?_

“Near the university. You’re in the university apartments, right?”

“Yeah.” _So he’s waiting for me. Wait… when did I tell him where I live?_ Makoto heaved himself down another step. And then another. And then another. _Oh, I wish I was at the bottom already._ He swallowed convulsively and closed his eyes to take another breather. When he opened his eyes, he counted the remaining steps. Eight. Okay, he could do this.

Sousuke didn’t say anything more as Makoto struggled down the remaining steps, his head bowed. As he arrived at the third to last… and then the second… and then the first… he became increasingly aware of the fact that he had just humiliated himself _yet again_ in front of the one guy in front of which he least wanted to look like a moron.

_Fuck my life._

He stepped onto the pathway at the base of the stairs and heaved a sigh of relief. Then, after taking a few breaths, he looked at Sousuke and smiled slightly - apologetically. “Sorry for making you wait.”

Sousuke stared at him for a few moments. Then he looked away towards the temple. “Have you always been scared of heights?” he asked.

“Mostly,” Makoto replied vaguely, his thoughts drifting briefly to memories of watching a funeral procession across a pier, of pursuing Rei’s bobbing figure across a night-lit sea, of a jar of fresh flowers in his parents’ front yard… He looked towards the temple. “I’m easily scared,” he clarified.

“Well, you’re kind of stuck on this route now,” Sousuke said. Makoto smiled wanly.

“Y-Yeah,” he agreed. “I know.” He put his hands in his jean pockets.

Sousuke flashed him a slight smile, then turned and began strolling down the path towards the temple. Makoto followed after him and tried not to look around and let his imagination spy things in the shadows that weren’t there. It was a small blessing that he wasn’t alone here, he supposed. A pity that it wasn’t Haru, but Sousuke was a friend too.

They passed through the inner gate and entered the inner gardens. There was the occasional light hanging from a wall sconce, but for the most part, the temple grounds were dark and silent. They made their way across the garden. Makoto tried to stick to the pavers, but Sousuke wasn’t so careful. Every step of his was accompanied by the heavy crunch of gravel beneath the soles of his shoes.

They were passing under the eaves of the temple roof, just outside one of the closed windows, when Sousuke abruptly stopped walking and turned to look at him, his face sober in the gloom.

“You know… about Rin’s girlfriend?” he said in his low voice.

“Hm?” Makoto halted and looked at him curiously. “Know what?”

“I didn’t want to hurt his feelings so I didn’t say anything at dinner…” Sousuke continued quietly. “But I don’t know if I did the right thing because I know he’ll find out eventually…”

Makoto eyed him confusedly. _What is he talking about?_

Sousuke sighed and turned his head to look across the temple grounds, at one of the lamp sconces in the wall opposite them that was broken and dark. “That girlfriend of his… I went out with her in middle school.”

“With a swimming coach?” _Is that legal?_

Sousuke baulked and shot a scowl at him. “Don’t be stupid. She was a high schooler then.” He paused, and then added, “I don’t know if Rin would be bothered by knowing this… maybe he wouldn’t care. But I know he’d definitely be bothered by the fact that I didn’t tell him straight up that she’s an ex of mine.”

Makoto swallowed. He didn’t know where to even begin with this kind of situation. _I don’t have any experience with this kind of problem._

“Regardless, he’s definitely going to cry about it.” Sousuke said with a grim smile.

“Were… you and she… serious?”

“Not really,” Sousuke admitted readily. His smile softened. “I think she just thought I was cute. She certainly was hot. Bet she still is. Damn smart, too. I was surprised to hear that she’s a swim coach. Maybe it’s a part time thing,” he added, more to himself than to Makoto.

There was a brief silence. Then Sousuke looked towards him. He was still smiling and the sight of it prompted a warm smile to Makoto’s lips. _Damn, he’s beautiful._ “So…” Sousuke continued quietly, “you’re not the only one with awkward secrets.” He cleared his throat. “Shall we press on?”

They moved slowly towards the station, Sousuke slightly in front, Makoto slightly behind and resisting the urge to clutch Sousuke’s shirt.

When they finally arrived at the train station, they didn’t have to wait long for the university bound vehicle. The train was fairly empty because it was a weekday night. They sat together, not saying anything. Sousuke’s arms were folded, his eyes closed as he leaned back in his seat. His arm felt warm where it touched Makoto’s.

Makoto took out his phone. Haru had messaged him: _Caught the train with Rin. Hope you get home okay._

He typed a message back to say that he was on the train and would see Haru tomorrow morning. When he finished and closed his phone, he glanced at Sousuke and noticed that the other guy’s eyes were open and looking at him.

“Ah… I thought you'd fallen asleep,” he said, hurriedly looking away as he felt himself blush. _We’re sitting way too close._

“I was wondering…” Sousuke said quietly, “… if you wanted to come over to mine tonight.”

“No,” Makoto said immediately. “I have to get up early tomorrow to see Haru…” Then he faltered. _Wait. What?!_ He turned his head to stare confusedly at Sousuke, but the other guy wasn’t looking at him anymore and was instead staring absently at the floor. _Wait. Had he just…?_

“Nah, it’s okay,” Sousuke said quickly.

Makoto turned his head and stared across the carriage at the train route map on the wall, his mind whirling. _Shit. Did I just turn him down? Did I seriously just…?_

“It’s fine,” Sousuke said then. His voice sounded distant to Makoto, who was still staring with unseeing eyes at the train map. _Can I say ‘yes’ now that I’ve said ‘no’? I’m not ready! What if it’s just a social visit? Isn’t he straight?_ “Another time.”

“Y-Yeah.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of texting ahead.  
> & now this tale is adult-rated. ;-)

After that night, despite messaging Sousuke on Friday morning with a question from one of their subjects, Makoto didn’t hear back from him until Sunday afternoon. The guy _was_ active on the online study forums for the course… everyday, in fact, but Makoto didn’t post anything, let alone interact with him on there. When he at last received a reply to his text, the apology was brief.

‘ _Sorry for the late answer. Re your question, here’s a pic of the relevant powerpoint slide. And my thumb. I’ll leave you to figure it out.’_

Makoto was studying in the library when he received the text. He had put his phone on silent, but felt it vibrate in his pocket. He smiled as he read it, his eyes lingering longer on the glimpse of Sousuke’s thumb holding the edge of the page in the attached picture than on the page itself, and then began hurriedly typing back. _Hopefully he’s still holding his phone._

_//Thanks. I figured out the answer a couple of hours ago.//_

He was about to put his phone away when Sousuke’s reply came through. _‘Ah. My bad for getting back late to you. Sorry.’_

 _//No. It’s my fault for being late to that biology lecture.//_ Makoto hesitated, then added, // _And then not staying.//_

_‘Glad you figured it out. Meet me for breakfast before that biology lecture? Tuesday 7:30 at B-Bar?’_

Makoto hesitated. _What’s Haru doing that day?_ Then his phone beeped again. He looked down at it:

_‘Your boyfriend can get himself up for a change. Although I can see why he relies on you. ;-)’_

He flushed. _Haru’s not my boyfriend._ And that was definitely a flirtation. And the winking emoticon? He felt his blush deepen and he plopped his face down on his arms on the desk. Why _had_ he turned down Sousuke’s offer to visit his place?

_Damn it!_

He raised his head and began texting Sousuke back:

 _//I’ll be there.//_ He pressed Send.

Sousuke’s reply wasn’t long delayed.

_‘Looking forward to it.’_

The rest of the afternoon passed uneventfully for Makoto. He went from the library to the gym, and then - as evening encroached, caught the train to the swim centre to meet up with Haru. Haru was still in the pool doing laps when he arrived at the pre-agreed time of seven so he took a seat on a bench near the side of the pool. It was hot and humid in the centre and he shrugged off his jacket, plopping the garment beside him on the bench as he waited.

“Yo. Mako- _chan_.”

He looked up and smiled when he saw Rin heading over, a wide grin on the swimmer’s face. “Rin.” The red head looked freshly showered and was wearing navy track pants and a dark grey T-shirt emblazoned with the English spelled names of foreign cities. _PARIS… NEW YORK… SEOUL…_

“You waiting for Haru?” Rin sank onto the seat beside Makoto and, putting his hands behind him on the bench for support, leaned back, legs apart. Makoto had to force himself to keep his eyes from drifting downwards.

“Yeah. We’re going for dinner. Would you like to join us?” _He sits worse than Sousuke._

“Nah. My girl’s expecting me.”

Makoto’s thoughts briefly drifted to Sousuke’s confession to him the other night. Of the fact that Sousuke was an ex of Rin’s current girlfriend. And that Rin apparently didn’t know this. He forced a smile. “It sounds really nice,” he said. _Wait, that wasn’t clear._ “Having a girlfriend, I mean.”

Rin eyed him thoughtfully for a few moments. Then he smiled. “Yeah. It is. It’s weird to think that I’m the only one with a partner at the moment. I think even Sousuke’s currently single.” He hesitated then, pursing his lips uncertainly, before frowning and continuing, “He is, isn’t he? I forgot to ask the other night. Sorry, by the way, for singling you and Haru out.”

“Ah… it’s okay.” _It’s not okay. But it’s done now. And Sousuke’s single?_ “And Sousuke hasn’t mentioned dating anyone.” _Is he really single?_

“Well… I wouldn’t expect him to talk aboutthem,” Rin said slowly. “He never does to me, anyway. But you can tell… or maybe I only noticed because I roomed with him last year.” The red head turned his head to look back at the pool. “He never used to bring them around, but he’d disappear overnight every now and again at Samezuka, and I’d sometimes see random girls waiting outside the Academy for him.” He huffed. “He’s a secretive kind of guy, I suppose. I used to think it was kind of cool, but then I found out about his shoulder…” He trailed off, a brooding look entering his face.

“Oh.” _A one night stand kind of guy… does he mean that? That’s good and bad, right? Although the fact that Rin has only mentioned Sousuke dating girls isn’t promising. Unless Rin’s being discreet? Or Sousuke is. Sousuke’s definitely been flirting with me… hasn’t he?_

Rin’s gaze suddenly flicked back to him. “Anyone you like at the moment?”

“N-Not really,” Makoto stammered, but he could feel himself reddening. It was an obvious lie. He felt his blush deepen when Rin eyed him closely. But then the guy - instead of calling him on it - nodded slowly before looking back at the pool. Silently, they watched Haru fly across the pool, their friend’s body weaving and curving through the water. Every time Makoto saw Haru swim nowadays, the guy reminded him even more of a fish. His body cut so smoothly and efficiently through the water. He was so beautiful in a pool.

Then Rin suddenly stirred and said, “Haru’s been a bit off recently… don’t you think?”

“Really?” Makoto thought back over his last few interactions with Haru. He had certainly noticed how Haru had practically run away from the conversation about sex at the dinner table the other night at Chubby Bowl. But he had seen Haru since then - when he had gone to get him out of his morning bath and walk with him to the train station - and he hadn’t noticed anything unusual on those occasions.

“I haven’t noticed anything,” he said honestly.

Rin frowned, a look of frustration briefly crossing his face as he watched Haru turn neatly at the end of the pool and begin another lap. “Well… I think he’s been avoiding me.”

 _Eh?_ Makoto turned his head and stared confusedly at him. “Haru wouldn’t do that,” he said flatly. _He adores Rin._

Rin didn’t look at him as he answered. The red head’s eyes remained fixed on Haru. “Well, he’s cancelled on me twice this week for lunch at the last minute. And dinner last night. We were also rostered to do our training at the same time… in adjacent laps, but he swapped… as you can see.”

_That does sound like something’s wrong._

“Has he cancelled on you at all?” Rin asked then. “Or behaved oddly in other ways?”

“No,” Makoto said. “He hasn’t.” _Well, apart from his delayed training today._ He smiled as he watched Haru finally halt at the end of the pool and stand up. Mouth open, panting hard, shoulders heaving, Haru removed his goggles and cap, shook his head slightly to rid his hair of excess water, and turned to look across at them. Standing and raising a hand, Makoto grinned and waved at his childhood friend. “HARU!” he called when Haru turned away to face the pool wall. “Over here!”

“ _Tsk!_ He saw you, you idiot,” Rin muttered as he stood up. “So. Let me know if you notice anything weird, okay?”

“Eh? Yeah, I will,” Makoto said. “Are you going already?” _He’s not waiting for Haru?_

Rin smiled tightly. “Yeah. My girl’s been waiting for me for awhile. I was going to try to talk with Haru about whatever’s been bothering him, but I think it can wait if he’s still treating everyone else the same. I better not keep her waiting anymore. And I don’t particularly want to deal with him tonight. Bye!”

“Bye.” Makoto watched the red head turn and stroll out of the centre. Then he turned back to watch Haru - who had by now climbed out of the pool and put on his jacket. His friend looked towards the doors through which Rin had just left; then padded over to him, expressionless as per usual.

“Hello. What did Rin want?” he asked.

 _Straight to the point._ “He said hello and that he was worried about you,” Makoto said readily. He smiled. “Is everything alright?”

“Fine,” Haru said quietly, with a small nod. Makoto eyed him closely, not sure he believed him. But then Haru looked away towards the doors that led to the changing rooms, and Makoto couldn’t see his expression anymore. “I”m going to shower,” Haru said. “Sorry for being late.”

“It’s okay,” Makoto said patiently, still smiling. However, his face sobered as he watched Haru walk away. _But seriously, it doesn’t sound like it is. I wonder what’s going on between him and Rin. Or is what Rin’s noticed just a series of coincidences? No. Haru’s not normally late. He doesn’t normally cancel on people at the last moment. And it sounds like he’s cancelled on Rin at the last moment a lot this week._

Haru was quieter than usual at dinner, but not significantly so. If Makoto hadn’t been concerned, he doubted that he would have noticed.

He elected not to bring up the subject of Rin again, figuring that Haru would not appreciate being dogged about the issue. Instead he chatted about his physiology course, about his tutorials, his assignments, and university life in general.

“By the way, I won’t see you on Tuesday morning,” he said apologetically. “I promised Sousuke I would meet him for breakfast before our lectures.”

Haru nodded in silent acquiescence. “How is he?” he asked.

“Uh… I haven’t seen him since dinner the other night. Good, I think.” He hesitated, then added, “He lives near me… although I’m not sure where exactly. He invited me over the other night, but I said no.” He flushed, suddenly acutely aware of what he had just said. _Why am I telling Haru all of these details?_ He raised a hand and rubbed the back of his neck. “It was too late.” _And now I’m justifying myself to him? I should just shut up._

There was a brief silence. Haru eyed him flatly for a few moments. “Do you like him?” he asked suddenly.

Makoto spluttered. He was glad he hadn’t got a mouthful of food because he would have choked or spat it out onto the table, possibly onto Haru. He stared at Haru, who was staring back at him, looking just as surprised as he felt. “W-What?!” Makoto stammered. _Did he seriously just ask…?_

Haru frowned faintly. Then he looked down at his miso ramen and began searching it with his chopsticks. He appeared to be searching the soup for more pieces of fish. Without apparent success. “Do you like him?” he repeated, not looking at him.

“…Y-Yeah.” _Haru had meant ‘like’ as a platonic kind of ‘like’… Hadn’t he? But still… the ambiguous wording…_

Another silence. Haru stirred the remnants of his soup idly, then raised his chopsticks to put them neatly down beside his bowl. “I’m glad,” he said quietly. “It sounded lonely for you at Tokyo U.”

Makoto stared at him. _Currently, it sounds lonely for_ you _,_ he thought. _Really, what_ is _going on between you and Rin?_ Even so, he felt a smile pull at his lips as he looked down at his ramen. “Yeah. He seems like a nice person.” He had ordered the same as Haru. He picked up a large piece of smoked mackerel from his bowl and put it in his friend’s. Haru’s chopsticks snapped it up immediately. “Maybe you should order the large size next time,” Makoto suggested. “Or even the super large.”

Haru’s eyes glittered. Makoto’s smile broadened.

They finished their meals, paid, and began walking towards the train station. Nearby, Makoto could see the outline of the swim centre two blocks away. The lights were out now. His limbs itched. He felt like jumping into a pool and swimming a few laps. Perhaps he should visit the university pool. The idea of swimming without Haru present felt weird, however. Would Sousuke swim with him? Probably not; Sousuke probably wasn’t swimming currently because of his shoulder… But Sousuke definitely still went to the gym and did… whatever he did to make himself look ridiculously incredible.

At the sheer thought of the guy’s body, he felt himself harden slightly and he flushed. _Damn it. Think about something else. Not Sousuke’s body. Not Sousuke. Anything but Sousuke._

His thoughts returned to Rin. “When will you next see Rin?”

“Tomorrow. Probably,” Haru said noncommittally. “Don’t worry about him.”

 _You say that… but of course I’m going to worry, and you know it._ Makoto sighed and looked towards the nearing train station. They were a block away now. Not long.

_They won’t talk it out unless they fight. That’s what happened the last time they had a disagreement. It’ll just remain a stand off and keep brewing until one of them explodes… well, until Rin explodes._

And then another thought suddenly struck him. _What if I ask Sousuke? He knows Rin better than I. Maybe Rin’s spoken to him about this too._

They arrived on the platform and when Makoto’s train arrived first, said their farewells. Makoto stepped on and as the train began accelerating down the track, he turned and watched and waved at Haru until he couldn’t see his friend anymore. Then he took a seat and took his phone out of his pocket. Flipping it open, he began a new text to Sousuke.

_//Hi. Saw Rin tonight. He said that Haru is avoiding him. Haru won’t talk to me about it. Have you heard anything? -Makoto//_

There was no immediate response. Makoto put his phone away and zoned out on the short journey back to his stop. On getting out, he checked his phone, but Sousuke still hadn’t replied. Was the guy at the gym? Cooking? In the bathroom? Jogging? Studying with his phone on silent? …Or with someone? Grimacing at the last thought, he repocketed the device and exited the station. _What he’s doing is none of my business_ , he reminded himself as he walked. _I’m thinking like a stalker. Or a jealous boyfriend. I’m not even sure he likes me that way. We’re definitely not together. I need to get a grip._

On returning to his apartment, he locked his door, toed off his shoes, set down his bag, and padded into the tiny studio to undress, then into the bathroom to shower. As he soaped up under the warm water, his thoughts returned to his phone, to Sousuke, and - feeling his interest stiffen - he ran his right hand down his abdomen and grasped his erection to start stroking himself to full hardness. It still felt wrong to do this whilst thinking of the guy, but also… right. Right primarily because the thought of him worked so well for this activity. He planted his left hand against the wall tiles above the faucets for support and bent forward slightly, letting his mouth fall open and soft gasps escape his lips as he pulled himself closer to completion.

_Those shoulders and arms…_

_That chest…_

_That waist…_

_That backside… and long legs…_

_That way he had of moving, how effortless he made everything look…_

_That smooth angular face. Those long eyelashes and intense eyes…_

_That smile…_

_The still discernible outline of the guy’s genitals under his compression swimmers…_

He gasped loudly as he came, thick ropes splattering out to coat the tiles and his right hand. _Fuck._ His breath stuttered between his teeth as he milked out the last droplets. Breathing hard, he stared dazedly at the white mess.

 _That was quicker than this morning._ He bit his lower lip. _If we ever get together, I’m definitely going to struggle not to come early._

He straightened and cupped his hands to catch water from the shower head. He used the handfuls to wash away the residue from the tiles. Then he rinsed off, turned off the faucets, and grabbed his towel to dry himself. He was just stepping out of the bathroom when he heard his phone beep softly from the main room. _Sousuke?_ He padded through and picked it out of the pile of discarded garments on the bed. On seeing the name of the sender, he smiled.

_‘Evening. You don’t need to sign your name after your texts, you know. I know it’s you. Rin mentioned something about Haru acting weirdly the other day. I haven’t heard anything more, sorry.’_

Makoto typed back immediately. _//That’s okay. Thanks anyway. Good night.//_

This time, Sousuke took less than a minute to respond. Makoto beamed as he read the message: _‘Sleep well, Makoto. See you at lectures tomorrow.’_


	5. Chapter 5

Sousuke’s hair was wet when he arrived at the lecture hall on Monday, just a few minutes shy of 10 o’clock, the appointed start time. Makoto was already there, had been for about fifteen minutes by then, and trying not to look too obvious with his frequent glances towards the door for the other guy.

He was pleased when Sousuke, after briefly glancing around the hall, fixed his gaze on him and strode over to take the seat beside him.

“Yo,” he muttered. “Ran into someone I knew; I almost didn’t make it.”

_See who? Wait, why should I care?_ Makoto squashed his nervousness and smiled brightly at him. “Welcome,” he greeted. He didn’t bother to keep his voice hushed; the _Nutrition 1_ lecturer was troubleshooting the computer, which had just crashed. “Did you just shower?” _Or swim?_

Sousuke blinked. Then he smiled. “Ah. My wet hair. Nah, I just came from the gym.”

“The university gym?”

Sousuke nodded. “I never see you there,” he said. “Well, except for last week in the showers.” He snickered.

Makoto flushed. _You didn’t have to bring that up. So awkward._

Sousuke glanced at the front of the hall to where the lecturer was waiting for the computer to restart, then back at Makoto. “You’re a member, aren’t you? When do you normally train?”

“I go in the afternoon. Do you usually go in the morning?” _Like today?_

“Yeah.”

“And tomorrow?”

“Same again.”

Makoto’s brow rose. _Seriously? But didn’t we plan…?_ “Before our breakfast?” _No wonder he ranked in the top ten swimmers nationally in middle school. If this is how he is when he’s_ not _training seriously…_

“Yeah.” Sousuke smiled at him. Makoto flushed. “It’s a habit that I don’t want to break.”

“It’s impressive,” Makoto stated, with both respect and admiration. “I wish I was that motivated.”

A soft snort. “Well, you’re motivated enough to visit Nanase- _san_ every morning by train. That takes commitment.”

“Y-Yeah, but it’s hardly the same.”

“Not really.” Sousuke said, lowering his voice as the lecturer began talking to the room, her powerpoint having finally loaded onto the wall projector. She was apologising for the delay. “Showing up is part of the battle too.”

“Uh…” Makoto twisted his lips, flushing deeply, as he turned his attention to the first slide. He picked up his pencil. _Yeah, I suppose_. Then, when Sousuke nudged him gently in the side with his elbow, he almost dropped the instrument. He turned his head and stared at the other guy, who winked and grinned at him.

“Come to the gym with me on Wednesday,” he murmured. “7am.”

“I have Haru.” _And I don’t want to._

“Tomorrow, then. At 6.”

“It’s too early,” Makoto protested. He stared anxiously at the other guy. _Seriously? I was just starting to get used to being able to sleep in a bit, even if I do go and see Haru every other day. It’s still a lie in compared to back home._ Sousuke was still smirking at him, and under the guy’s regard, Makoto felthis flush deepen, his penis stiffening slightly and making his briefs uncomfortable in his jeans. “Fine,” he muttered, relenting. _But I really don’t want to. But just this once should be okay._ He looked hurriedly back at the lecturer and started taking notes. A few minutes later, he started in his chair when he felt Sousuke’s wrist rest across his arm.

_Aah! Why are you touching me?_ Makoto looked back at him. _What does he want now?! Don’t touch me!_ But Sousuke wasn’t looking at him and instead gazing at Makoto’s open notebook, which he was scribbling on with his pen.

_‘Your face is all red again.’_

Makoto cringed, shrinking in his chair as he felt himself turn even more crimson. He stared at the damning words. _Why did he have to point it out? I can’t help it!_ Beside him, Sousuke snorted softly. Makoto’s arm tingled where Sousuke’s wrist was _still_ resting, heavy and warm… and now moving again. The guy was writing something else…

_‘It’s distracting.’_

Makoto swallowed. He shifted his own arm slightly… _His arm feels really heavy, actually._ …and began writing beneath Sousuke’s last message.

_//I’m sorry.//_

_‘Don’t apologise!’_

_//Sorry.//_

_‘I like it.’_

Makoto froze. _Wait, what? He likes me blushing?_ He turned his head to stare confusedly at him. Sousuke was smirking slightly, his eyes hooded and slightly obscured by his long eyelashes. _Is he flirting with me? He is, isn’t he?_ For a few moments, they just stared at each other. Makoto wished that he could talk to him, to ask him, even though he wasn’t sure he’d be able to get the right words out anyway, but the lecturer was talking and the rest of the class was so silent…

Sousuke’s wrist began moving again and Makoto flinched. He looked down to see what the other guy was writing now.

_‘I’m busy this afternoon, but I’ll see you tomorrow morning, okay?’_

Makoto swallowed and wrote a slightly unsteady reply:

_‘Looking forward to it.’_

Another soft, almost inaudible snort, and - grinning - Sousuke scribbled something quickly before finally moving his arm away and returning his attention to the lecture.

_‘Me too.’_

When Makoto snuck a sidelong glance at him a couple of minutes later, Sousuke wasn’t looking at him, but at the projection of a picture of the gastrointestinal system. There was a small smile on his lips.

Makoto smiled and, still aware that he was flushing, and still uncomfortably hard, turned over the page in his notebook… _I won’t be able to write on that… or throw it out…_ and started to try to pay attention to the lecture.

The _Nutrition 1_ and _Exercise Health_ lectures were back to back. Sousuke didn’t stay long afterwards. As they walked out of the lecture hall, the guy stated that he was in a hurry, and with a grin, he turned and strode off towards the train station. Smiling, Makoto headed to the gym to do a quick workout before moving on to the library to study.

He was still in the library late that afternoon when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. _Sousuke?_ Upon taking out the device, his smile faltered a little when he saw that it was Haru calling him. _We weren’t supposed to catch up this evening, were we?_

He accepted the call and pressed the phone to his ear. “Haru?” he queried quietly, glancing around at the people studying at other tables in the library.

He couldn’t hear anything. _Bad reception? Or did he move away from the phone?_ He rose and went over to a nearby empty meeting room. “Haru?” he asked as he went inside. He shut the door behind him. ”Haru, are you there?”

_“Hey.”_

Haru said it so softly, Makoto almost didn’t hear him. He frowned. “Can you speak up?”

A soft noise. Like a swallow. Or a sob. _Eh?_ Then a retching noise. Makoto’s eyes widened. _He’s sick?_

“Haru?” he demanded. “What’s wrong?”

_“Can you…_ ” A wet cough. “… _come get me?”_

“Where are you?” Makoto queried. On receiving no response except for the distant sound of retching, Makoto left the room and returned to his bag. He shoved his books into it, shouldered it, and hurried out of the building and off to the train station. “Where are you?” he asked as he jogged towards the platform.

“…Home.”

“Your apartment?” He was on the stairs now. He could see a city-bound train pulling in. _If I take that one, I can transfer down the line to one that will take me to Haru’s._

“No.”

_Fucking hell. Surely not! No. No!_ “Not Iwatobi?!” He dashed onto the train. _Please still be in Tokyo._ If he left now for Iwatobi, he’d be lucky to be home by 10pm and he probably wouldn’t be back in the city until midday tomorrow at the earliest.

“No, I’m in Tokyo.”

Oh, thank God. Makoto didn’t fancy a five hour train trip. At the start of peak hour too. But getting answers out of Haru over the phone was so frustrating normally, let alone when Haru wasn’t well and being even more vague than usual! “So where are you?”

“Yours.”

“Ah.” And _damnit_! The train doors were shut and the carriages were moving now. _I’m going the wrong way._ “I’ll be there in 15. Don’t _do_ anything until I get there!” he begged. He hopped off at the next station and caught the train heading in the opposite direction. Getting off at his stop, he jogged to his building and up the stairs. There was no sign of Haru outside his door, but he had given his friend a spare key so that didn’t surprise him. He tried the door and, finding it unlocked, ran inside, kicking off his shoes and dropping his bag in the entryway.

“Haru!” he called. He ran into the tiny room.

Haru was sitting on the floor with his arms around his knees. His profile to the door, he was leaning back against the bed. There was a bucket from the bathroom beside him. When Makoto entered, he raised his head slightly and glanced sidelong at him. He looked very pale and his usually bright blue eyes were listless.

“Haru, what is it?” Makoto huffed anxiously as he padded into the room, vaguely noticing that his T-shirt was stuck to him from sweating during his mad dash across the university grounds. He glanced at the vomit in the bowl. _Is he just vomiting? Gastro? Or is it stress-related vomiting? But he’s never been sick from stress before._ He wasn’t too alarmed. At least… Haru didn’t look seriously injured… Or mad like during Nationals when he completely flipped. _But he does look very pale._ “What happened?”

Haru opened his mouth. Then he hesitated and turned his face away completely so that Makoto couldn’t see his expression at all. He stretched out his legs under the small table that Makoto used for meals and studying.There was a long pause.

“Haru?” Makoto prompted, gently.

“…I couldn’t swim properly today.” Haru’s voice was barely audible. “I couldn’t concentrate so I stopped.”

“Is it Rin?” Makoto asked. He knew it probably was. _Something_ had happened. _Something_ was going on. He glanced at Haru’s sports bag, which was lying on the floor, its zipper wide open. He could see Haru’s slide phone on the top, its glass surface black. _Asleep? Or turned off?_ “What happened?”

“He wanted to talk.”

_Isn’t that a good thing?_

“I …couldn’t.”

_Ah. Well, that’s not so good._

Makoto exhaled. He was hot and exhausted after that sprint. He could still feel perspiration running down his back. He needed a shower. He stepped closer and flopped down onto the floor in front of Haru, on the other side of the table. And then he looked back at his friend.

And saw the other side of his face.

Blood. A decent amount too. Caked on Haru’s dark hair above and behind his ear. Fresh and old. His eyes widened, and with a horrified cry, he launched himself forward and grabbed his friend by his shoulders. “Haru! You’re bleeding!” _He smells like chlorine. He hasn’t showered._

Haru squirmed slightly under his weight. “It doesn’t hurt. You’re heavy.”

“That’s besides the point!” Makoto squawked, only half listening as he searched the caked blood for the cut with his fingers. There was a significant raised and discoloured bump on Haru’s head around the bloodied site too. “It looks really bad!” he continued. The cut was at least 5 centimetres. He’d never seen such a bad cut on Ran or Ren.

“You’re really heavy!” Haru complained again, louder this time, frowning up at him. “Get off!”

“Ah?! Sorry!” Makoto apologised, and obligingly shifted his weight so that he was straddling Haru rather than putting his whole weight on his friend’s lap. Most of the bleeding had settled, but he would definitely need stitches. _And the vomiting sounds bad._ “Did you black out?”

“No.” Haru said quickly. Then he hesitated. Makoto stared at him in disbelief. _Haru!_ “…I don’t know.” Haru admitted finally, quietly. “Maybe a couple of seconds.”

“What happened?” Makoto demanded. “Was it Rin? Did… did he hit you?” _He wouldn’t, would he? Well, he can lash out…_

Haru glanced up at him, his expression hunted. Then he looked away to the side again. He licked his lips. “We were both angry…” he began slowly.

Makoto's eyes narrowed. _So it was! And he’s excusing him._ His face twisted. _Fucking hell!_ _Damnit Rin!_

_“_ We were arguing…” Haru continued.

_Of course!_

“…and then I …fell and hit my head.”

_Fell, my arse._

Makoto reached into his pocket for his phone. Flipping it open, he began looking through his list of contacts, absently noting he’d received a couple of missed calls (must have been on the train) and a text message from Sousuke. He pulled his arm away when Haru suddenly grabbed for the device.

“What are you doing?” Haru snapped. “Don’t call him!” He reached for the device again, but Makoto turned his body away, simultaneously pressing the dial button against Rin’s name. He held the phone to his ear.

The phone dialled a few times. And then, finally, he heard Rin’s voice. _“Mako-chan? Is Haru-chan with you?”_

“Haru’s bleeding!” Makoto snapped down the line. “Where the hell are you?”

“Makoto,” Haru murmured. Makoto turned back to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. _I can handle Rin, Haru._

_“What? I’m at home. He’s bleeding? I don’t understand,”_ Rin said confusedly. _“His coach called me looking for him. Is he okay?”_

“Why’d you leave him?” Makoto continued furiously. “He’s vomiting and he said he blacked out!” He shook his head at Haru when his friend repeated his name and reached up for the phone.

_“Oi! What the fuck are you talking about?”_ Rin said angrily. Makoto blinked. _Wait. What?! “I said his coach called me to say he wasn’t answering his phone and that something happened at the centre this afternoon. I met Sousuke for lunch and then I went home! Where the fuck_ are _you?”_

Makoto turned his head to stare down at Haru. His childhood friend was staring at him with an oddly stricken expression, his blue eyes huge. _Rin went home. Rin wasn’t there._ “Wait. You weren’t there?” He shook his head. _Didn’t Haru say Rin was the one fighting him? No. No, he didn’t. He didn’t name anyone._ “Haru, who was it?” _Another swimmer?_

Haru’s gaze slid away. His lips were slightly parted. He looked pale. _Why is he looking so anxious?_

_“I wasn’t there. I swear! I haven’t seen Haru since training this morning.”_ Rin continued in his ear. His tone was worried now. _“I tried to talk to him in the morning because he wasn’t swimming as well as he usually does and it was pissing me off, but he blew me off.”_

And then it clicked. _And then Rin met Sousuke for lunch…_

_Sousuke’s threatened Haru in the past. Could he? Had he?_

_No._

_“Are you at the hospital? I’ll come!”_ Rin continued, but Makoto barely heard him as he had already lowered the phone slightly to stare at the screen as he opened up Sousuke’s latest text.

_//Call me ASAP!//_ the message simply read.

_Fucking hell, no._

_No!_

He raised the phone back to his ear. “Rin, where’d you last see Sousuke?” he demanded. In front of him, Haru regarded him apologetically, and - when Makoto shot him a questioning look - he nodded slightly.

_“Eh? At a cafeteria near the swim centre. Why?”_

Makoto slumped back onto his heels and Haru’s shins, bumping the table edge with his back. _Fuck. What a fucking mess._ He stared numbly at Haru’s bloodied head. The blood was trickling down onto Haru’s neck and into the line of his polo shirt, staining the white material bright red. His friend seemed oblivious to his own injury and was eyeing him with concern.

_What the hell is wrong with Sousuke? And this is my fault too for telling him.  I bet Rin whinged to him at lunch so he went and confronted Haru… And then something happened. And now Haru’s injured. On top of whatever else is bothering him at the moment._ He raised his free hand to rub at his face. Flashes came to his mind’s eye of Sousuke yelling at him last Tuesday after their biology lecture, snapping at him to undress in the shower, chastising him for his blushing, grabbing his arm… _He’s really scary when he’s angry. What did he do?_

_“OI! Mako-chan. Talk to me. What’s Sousuke got to do with this? Where the fuck are you two?”_

“At mine,” Makoto said weakly. He made to get up, then - finding that Haru was holding onto his shirt, twisted awkwardly and sank onto the bed to Haru’s side. He shook his head at Haru, who was staring worriedly at him. “I’m fine, Haru,” he said, before telling Rin, “Rin, we’re heading to the hospital now. I think Haru needs stitches. Meet us there in half an hour?”

_“Sure.”_

“And Rin?” Makoto quickly added.

_“Yeah?”_

“Please don’t tell Sousuke.”

There was a confused pause. Then, when Rin next spoke, his voice was hard. _“I see,”_ he muttered. _“You got it.”_


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the waiting room...

It was crowded in the emergency waiting room. Makoto picked seats near the door, so that they could see Rin when the guy arrived. Beside him, Haru still looked a bit pale, but otherwise okay. He had been given some tablets for pain and to settle his stomach by a nurse, and was sitting with his eyes closed.

Makoto glanced at his watch. It was over half an hour since they had left his place. Rin should arrive any moment now. He took his phone out of his pocket and stared at the last text he had received from Sousuke. There was a voicemail message as well. He should probably listen to it. A sigh beside him and then Haru flopped against his shoulder. He felt warm and heavy. Makoto looked sidelong at him.

“Haru?” he asked softly. “You okay?”

“Fine. Just tired.” A pause, then, quietly, “I want to swim.”

Makoto blinked. Then he smiled. _Well, that sounds like normal Haru at least._ He flipped his phone shut. “Want to tell me about what’s going on between you and Rin?”

Another pause. Then, “…No.”

“If it’s affecting your swimming, it’s not good.”

“I know,” Haru said, opening his eyes. He stared absently across the noisy waiting room. Then he closed his eyes again. Makoto pursed his lips.

“Can you… tell me what happened between you and Sousuke?” he asked.

“Nothing happened.”

_Aaaah. So annoying._ Makoto eyed him irritably. _How can he tell me such a blatant lie?_ “There’s a cut on your head,” he pointed out.

Haru sighed.

“Haru- _chan_? I thought we were going to try talking more after what happened at Nationals,” Makoto added then.

“He…”

_Yes?_

“You’re so annoying!” Haru huffed.

_Coming from Haru, that’s kind of…_ Makoto snickered lightly, trying not to let his shoulders shake too much and disturb Haru. “Go on,” he chuckled.

“He told me to talk to Rin because my mood is starting to affect him… and me.”

“Just… told you?” _Didn’t shout at you? Didn’t threaten you?_ “He told you this in a normal conversational tone?”

“…Well, he was annoyed.” Haru’s voice was becoming even more monotonous and soft than usual.

Makoto exhaled. _I don’t know what that means. ‘Annoyed’ could cover anything from the guy’s normal curt and verbally confronting manner all the way through to outright aggression._ “And then what happened?” he prompted, pushing on.

“And then we started arguing…”

“Mm?”

“…Because he said some things… and I got angry.”

_Things? What things? What could Sousuke possibly have said to provoke anger from Haru? Makoto had only ever managed it once: last year, when Haru had struggled with figuring out whether he wanted to swim professionally or not._ Makoto frowned. “What things?”

Haru didn’t answer immediately, but his expression was thoughtful so Makoto didn’t prompt him. After a brief silence, his friend exhaled. “He called me a few names,” he began. “Said that I was messing with Rin’s head and asked if I ‘got off’ on hurting him. I didn’t respond and I tried to walk away, but I think that annoyed him even more.” He paused, then added suddenly, “I don’t, by the way.”

Makoto furrowed his brow. “Don’t what?”

“…I don’t enjoy hurting Rin.”

“I _know_ , Haru.” Makoto was surprised to hear him even make a point of telling him such a thing. “What else happened?”

“Good.” Haru said quietly. “Then he said that I’ve made Rin feel like he’s to blame for my problems.”

“Anything else?”

“He talked about you too.” Haru shifted his head slightly against his shoulder so that he could see him. His blue eyes were clouded, Makoto noticed. Was Haru still feeling sick? He was still a bit pale. “Do you want to know what he said?”

“I do.” _I’m not sure._

“He said that I have you on a…” he lowered his voice for the next word, “… _fucking_ … leash and that he calls you my boyfriend because you… well, I don’t know what you’ve told him, but he thinks you wake me up every day. He said it was _…weird_ , that I wasn’t in grade school anymore, and that I needed to get a … _fucking_ grip.” His voice trailed off.

_It sounds like Sousuke ripped into him._ “Is that when you started to fight? Did he hit you?”

“We didn’t _fight_ ,” Haru insisted quietly. “And he didn’t hit me. I told him… actually I yelled at him that I wasn’t a child and that my problems were none of his fucking business.” He swallowed. “Like a child, I suppose, because he laughed, which just made me more angry. He said I never talk to anyone when I have a problem and I …stew in my own… mess…” He paused and sighed. “…and that I need to get my… _shit_ together.”

“So how did you fall? You’re sure that he didn’t hit you?”

“He didn’t.” Haru shook his head slightly, his soft hair ruffling against Makoto’s jacket. “He was walking towards me and I stepped back a few paces and slipped. There were others there. He got kicked out.” He sighed again. “I’m tired. It doesn’t hurt and I feel fine,” he added quickly. “I’m just tired now.”

“Go to sleep,” Makoto said gently. He watched Haru’s eyes slide closed. Then he opened his phone again. Rin had left a message to say that he was delayed due to traffic. Makoto closed the text and went to his missed call list. He stared at Sousuke’s number for a few moments.

Then, with a soft exhalation, he dialled his voicemail. He pressed the device to his ear:

‘ _You have one voicemail message. Recorded today at 17:04._

_“Hey! It’s Sousuke. Call me. It’s urgent. I need you to check on Nanase-san and I don’t have his number. I don’t want to bother Rin.”_

_End of message. Please indicate if you wish to replay, save, or delete?”_

Sousuke’s voice was audibly raised and distressed. _He’s such a stoical guy normally. He sounds like he was really upset by what happened. And from Haru’s account it does sound like it was an accident._

Makoto snapped the device shut and leaned back in his chair. He wasn’t going to call Sousuke just yet. _Although he sounds really worried so I should call him soon. I don’t want to disturb Haru, though._ He stared absently at the glass doors of the waiting room.

As the doors opened to admit someone, he looked away so as to not appear like he was staring. He looked sidelong at Haru who was slumped against his shoulder, already appearing fast asleep, his breathing coming deep and evenly. Makoto’s brow creased as he stared at his childhood friend. _What’s been bothering you so much, Haru?_

About ten minutes passed. And then a nurse came into the waiting room, a clipboard in her arms, and began calling out names.

“Nanase Haruka,” she called suddenly. “Nanase Haruka?”

A bit surprised at being called so soon, Makoto raised a hand. Against his arm, Haru stirred and looked up. The nurse, however, glanced at them and then continued looking around. “Nanase Haruka?” she called again.

Makoto stood up. “Uh… Haruka’s a guy,” he volunteered, flushing slightly when a few other people waiting, including the nurse, looked at him intently. Some of those waiting had been there longer than them, all older. _Well, it’s true! And I’m just as confused as to why we’re being called so soon as well. I thought we would have been sitting waiting here for a few hours before being attended at least._ Beside him, Haru rose.

“Wait here for Rin,” Haru told him quietly, before heading over to join the little group of patients that the nurse had summoned with her list of names. She double checked his date of birth and then - with an apology and little bow to him for presuming his sex - took them inside the department, the patients behind her following like ducklings in a neat line.

Makoto settled back in his chair and took out his phone. Should he call Sousuke, then?

He jumped, almost dropping the device when it suddenly began ringing loudly, the display lighting up to announce that none other than Sousuke was calling him.

_Of course. Just my luck._

He accepted the call and pressed the phone to his ear. “Hello?”

_“Hey, are you with Haru?”_ Sousuke sounded breathless. _“He’s in emergency.”_

_Eh? How does he know that? Surely Rin didn’t tell him? But who else…?_ “I’m in emergency with him,” Makoto said, not seeing any point in denying it. “But who told you that he was here?”

_“Oh.”_ A hesitant pause, and then, _“…My brother. He’s a registrar there,”_ Sousuke said gruffly.

_Eeeh? Seriously?_ “Your brother is an emergency doctor?” _Wow. But that must be incredibly stressful._

_“Yeah,”_ Sousuke said, sounding more annoyed now. _“Look, is Nanase-san okay? He fell pretty hard.”_

Makoto faltered. “Yes, I think so,” he said then. “The nurse just called him in…” He trailed off.

“He’s acting normally and everything?” Sousuke interrupted.

“Yes. Definitely.” _He sounds like a doctor himself. So bossy. I wonder if there are other doctors in his family. Maybe that’s why he’s so calm about all this stuff. I think I’d lose it if I had to have surgery on my shoulder soon._

_“Did he tell you what happened?”_ Sousuke asked then.

“Yeah,” Makoto replied. “He said he fell.”

_“Technically, yes, but it’s my fault. He was backing away from me because I was getting in his space, and he slipped. I was angry.”_ Sousuke’s voice was rough.

So he’s admitting that it’s his fault. _But Haruka said he was angry too._ “Haru said that he was angry too.”

There was a long pause. _“They’ll want someone to stay with him overnight,”_ Sousuke said then. _“I think that should be you, I’m afraid, given Nanase’s current relationship with Rin.”_

Makoto frowned. _So he tells Haru that our relationship is too close and then tells me to sleep over with him?_ Then, another thought striking him, he ventured, “Sousuke?”

“Yeah?”

“Is their… issue why you met with Rin for lunch? To talk about what’s going on with Haru?”

_“Yeah, mostly, I suppose. Rin was pretty upset. That’s why I went to talk to Nanase afterwards. I thought it’d be okay.”_

“Well, it wasn’t.”

_“Well, that’s obvious, isn’t it!”_ Sousuke snapped. Makoto flinched, then scowled. _What the hell?_ A pause, then he heard the other guy sigh. _“Sorry. Shit. Look, I know I’m in the wrong here. That’s self-evident. I’m sorry.”_

Makoto scowled. “Hey, don’t apologise to me,” he snapped. He faltered when he saw a few people turn their heads to look at him. Standing, he hurriedly walked out of the front doors of the waiting room and stood outside on the pavement beside the full ambulance bay. The place smelt of exhaust and burnt rubber.

_“You still there?”_ Sousuke asked.

“Yeah. I went outside,” Makoto said irritably. He absently watched an ambulance pull out of the bay and trundle off down the road. “Look, you need to apologise to Haru, not to me.”

_“Of course I will!”_ Sousuke snapped. _“I’m not an idiot. I’m apologising to_ you _because you deserve an apology too! I didn’t mean to stuff up your afternoon today or to hurt Nanase. And now we’ll miss our date tomorrow as well, so I’m sorry about that too.”_

_Our date. He called it a date. He also called me an idiot, but he still called it a date._

Makoto flushed. Despite his anger, despite knowing that he’d just been insulted, he just… He swallowed and took a deep breath, willing away the tightness in his chest. _What is wrong with me? Haru’s injured and Sousuke’s mostly to blame and I’m getting lovey dovey feelings about the villain in entirely the wrong place!_

_“Makoto? Oi! You there?”_

“Yeah.”

_“Jeez, I keep thinking you’ve hung up.”_ Sousuke grumbled.

“Sorry.”

_“Stop fucking apologising!”_ the other guy snapped. Makoto cringed. _“No! Wait. I meant… no, I’m sorry, goddammit! I was looking forward to tomorrow.”_

Makoto felt a touch to his shoulder. Turning, his eyes widened and he smiled when he saw Rin standing there in a black tank top and jacket, and khaki coloured jeans, his expression anxious.

“Where’s Haru?” the red head demanded.

“Sousuke,” Makoto said hurriedly. “Rin’s here. I have to go.”

_“Go,”_ Sousuke said quietly. _“I hope he’s okay. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”_

“Okay.” Makoto ended the call and looked at Rin. “He’s inside. Let’s go.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Dude, why are you in a collar?” Rin asked. The redhead stood opposite Makoto at the head of the emergency bed and peered down at Haru, who was lying on his back and staring up at the ceiling. There was a brightly coloured plastic brace about his neck.

“They want to scan my neck,” Haru replied, glancing at him before his gaze shifted to Makoto. “It’s okay,” he reassured, evidently reading Makoto’s anxiety.

“What about your head, Haru?” Makoto asked.

“They’ll scan that too,” Haru said.

Makoto nodded and sank into the plastic chair beside the bed. In the time that he had spent talking to Sousuke on the phone, waiting for Rin, and navigating the internals of the department - explaining to Rin what had happened to Haru as they searched for their friend’s location - Haru had been changed into a hospital gown, put in a bed, and had a drip stuck in his arm. It was weird to see the dark haired boy lying there, and incredibly disconcerting. _I thought it was a simple head injury. I wonder what made them concerned enough to want to scan his head._ Haru looked so small and frail somehow.

Rin continued to peer down at Haru. He was looking at the cut now. “Are they going to stitch that up?” he asked. “It’s still bleeding.”

Makoto eyed the oozing cut; watched a droplet slowly slide down an encrusted lock to finally drop onto the sheet. He watched and waited for another droplet to form, but it took so long to start winding down the lock that he lost interest. Across from him, Rin finally sighed and, his expression brooding, retreated from hovering over Haru to come around the bed and pull up a seat at Makoto’s side. He shoved his hands into his jacket pockets and leaned back, his legs parting…

Makoto deliberately looked away and back at Haru. Then, not finding anything of new interest, he began looking around the small cubicle - the various equipment attached to Haru’s arms and chest,  the monitor screen displaying coloured numbers on the other side of the bed, the call bell, the power points, the assortment of equipment behind the bed… _I don’t know what any of that stuff is or does… that’s a mask, but I don’t know what that thing is…_

Beside him, Rin stirred and - glancing at him - Makoto saw the guy take out his phone and begin tapping out a text. _Is he writing to his girlfriend?_

Someone walked past and he turned his head to watch the back of a passing nurse as she headed into a neighbouring cubicle. A few minutes later the nurse reappeared and came into Haru’s cubicle. She did a brief check of his vital signs, shone a torch into his eyes, felt his hands and legs, and asked after his pain and nausea - to which Haru replied that he had none. Then she asked him a few memory questions - which Haru answered correctly - before disappearing again, this time towards the staff workstation just out of sight.

_Maybe I should find something to do as well,_ he thought. He leaned back in his chair and took out his phone as well. Flipping it open, he stared at the home screen for a few moments before opening up the messages application and staring at the last message received.

… _Call me ASAP!_

He began composing a reply:

_‘Haru waiting on scans. He’s wearing a collar.’_

Sousuke’s reply was prompt. // _Thanks for the update._ //

Makoto lowered the device and looked over at Rin who was still tapping away at his phone. The guy’s eyes were fixed on the screen, a small smile on his lips.

Someone else walked past the front of the cubicle, in the opposite direction of the staff workstation. Someone tall, broadly built, and wearing a white coat and thin spectacles. He had dark hair cropped similarly to Sousuke’s. _Is that Sousuke’s brother? He didn’t even look at us, though._

“Yo,” Rin said suddenly, and Makoto looked at him. The guy was eyeing him with a small smile and raised eyebrows. “You both know Shigino Kisumi, don’t you?”

“Eh? Yeah.” Makoto glanced at Haru, then on realising that he couldn’t see Haru’s expression from this angle anyway, returned his attention to Rin. “He went to the same middle school as us. Why?”

“He’s studying at Tokyo U too,” Rin said, waving his phone at him, the screen bright and on an open message. Rin lowered the device before Makoto could read any of it. “Sousuke said he bumped into him this morning at the gym.”

_Eh? Sousuke did? Is that the person he said almost made him late? …Wait. Rin’s messaging Sousuke? Not his girlfriend? Or… both?_

“Oi, Mako-chan, _say_ something. Or don’t you know him?”

“No, I do,” Makoto said, blinking. He smiled apologetically. “Sorry, I was distracted. I used to coach his little brother Hayato at the swim club back home.”

“Oh yeah, there’s quite an age difference, isn’t there. Like… ten years?”

_There’d have to be a similar age difference between Sousuke and his brother._ “Yeah, about that many, I think.” His thoughts returned to the tall, pink-haired guy who had convinced him to play basketball in middle school… after Haru suddenly quit swimming. “What’s he studying?”

“Medicine.”

“Whoa. Really?” _He must have studied really hard in high school. I wonder what kind of grades he got to get into Tokyo U for medicine. It’s funny that we’ve all ended up at the same university… all away from home._ “That’s impressive.”

“Sousuke asked if we wanted to have dinner together sometime this week,” Rin continued.

“Sure!” Makoto said eagerly. _Maybe we can hang out at uni too. And it’d be nice to find out how Hayato’s doing; that kid’s so sweet._ He looked towards the bed. “Haru, you’ll come won’t you?”

There was no answer. _Is he okay?_ Makoto quickly stood and looked down at his friend’s face, but Haru’s eyes were open. On seeing him, they shifted to regard him glumly. “Haru?”

“… If I have time,” Haru said, but he didn’t sound too enthusiastic about it. _Yeah, he always was a bit touchy about Kisumi. But he said ‘yes’ so he can’t dislike him._

" _Tsk!_ Honestly, if you heard Mako- _chan_ the first time, answer him," Rin grumbled. Makoto looked warily back at the red head who was leaning back in his chair, legs folded with one foot on his opposing knee, his arms folded, an irritated look on his face.

_He's sick. Don't be so unfair._ But Makoto didn't voice his protest. Instead he smiled slightly and attempted, appeasingly, "Well, we're all agreed to go now, right? What day was Sousuke thinking?"

"Thursday or Friday?"

Makoto was about to venture consent for either date when Haru said flatly, "I'm busy Thursday."

_Doing what?_ Makoto glanced curiously down at the dark haired guy, but Haru didn't elaborate. Makoto frowned as he looked back at Rin. "Friday, then."

Rin's lips twisted. “I’ve got a date on Friday, so I'll have to step this one out. Next time, I guess." He huffed and looked down at his phone to began typing his reply to Sousuke. For a few moments, no one said anything. Then the red head stopped typing. "Sent," he said. He looked back at Makoto. "I haven't seen Kisumi since Sano Elementary. I can't imagine him being a doctor. I still remember him running around hugging everyone. Like a pink haired Nagisa."

“ _Pfft_! _”_ Makoto snickered at the description of Nagisa. “He's still energetic," he said. “But he’s not quite as loud as Nagisa. It was interesting to see him with his brother; he was really worried when Hayato had trouble learning how to swim. I’m not used to seeing him look so serious.”

"He still gives unsolicited hugs," Haru piped up quietly.

Makoto snickered. _It's true!_ Then, when he saw that same doctor pass the entrance of the cubicle again, he felt his face sober, his thoughts returning to Sousuke's brother. _Is that what Kisumi is going to be like in a few years?_ He opened his mouth to mention Sousuke’s brother’s position here in the hospital, but then closed his mouth immediately. Haru would have mentioned it if someone had introduced himself as Sousuke's brother.

Someone new appeared and wheeled Haru off in the bed for his scan. Makoto retook his seat next to Rin. The red head was staring at his phone again, a glum expression on his face.

"Is Sousuke okay?" Makoto asked.

"Yeah," Rin said, his eyes flicking to regard him. "I heard you shouting at him earlier on the phone so I didn't lay into him. He means well, you know." He paused, then added ruefully, "And it's partly my fault for complaining to him about Haru- _chan_." He raised a hand and scratched at his head. "He's a caring guy, even if he has a foul mouth and looks serious most of the time."

Makoto smiled despite himself. _That pretty much answers my concerns. I’m glad Rin also doesn’t think Sousuke meant any harm. That’s reassuring._ "Yeah, he sounded really worried about Haru on the phone.”

Rin sighed and shoved his phone back in his pocket. His gaze shifting to stare at the empty space left by the absent bed, he laced his fingers together and stretched his arms above his head before folding them behind his head and leaning back in the chair. There was a long silence. Then, Rin said quietly, “Don’t be too mean to him when you see him next, yeah?”

“Ah? I won’t,” Makoto said. _I think it was all an accident. I’m sure Sousuke is feeling really bad about all of this._

The minutes drifted by. Then Haru returned and they stood and looked down at him. “Did they tell you anything?” Makoto asked. Haru shook his head and reached up to tug at the edge of the neck brace.

“Oi,” Rin snapped, scowling. “Keep your head still.”

Haru’s eyes narrowed as they slid across to shoot a glare at the red head. There was so much disdain in the look that Makoto was faintly surprised. “It’s uncomfortable,” Haru pointed out as he lowered his hand.

“Yeah, well it’s there for a reason,” Rin retorted, his scowl deepening. “So quit squirming.”

Haru’s jaw tightened and he looked away.

_Guys, please don’t argue,_ Makoto wanted to say, but he knew that Haru and Rin would do whatever regardless of what he said anyway. They had that kind of relationship. _At least they’re talking right now, even if they are bickering._ He stepped back. “I’m going to find the toilet and get something to eat,” he said, and he left the cubicle to head towards the staff workstation to ask for directions to the visitors’ toilet.

He took his time at the hospital cafe and used the opportunity to call Sousuke to update the guy on Haru’s condition. When he finally wandered back to the emergency department, almost an hour later, he found that Rin had disappeared. One of the visitor chairs had disappeared and been replaced with a trolley on which a bunch of wrapped equipment was lying. “What’s happening? Where’d Rin go?”

“I don’t know,” Haru said. “To eat, maybe?” Makoto eyed him pensively for a few moments, then quietly sat back down. _Did they keep arguing?_ “A doctor came by when you were out, by the way. Said he was Yamazaki’s brother.”

_Eh? I missed him? Damn!_ “What did he look like?”

“Like Yamazaki. Just as tall, but thinner. He was wearing glasses. He said Yamazaki told him I was coming in; did you know?”

_That must have been the guy I saw earlier, then. But what do I say now? I’m terrible at lying. It’ll have to be the truth._ “Sousuke called me when I was waiting for Rin in the waiting room earlier,” Makoto admitted. “He knew you were here and when I asked how he knew, he said he’d asked his brother to look out for you.”

Haru didn’t say anything for a few moments. He stared listlessly up at the ceiling. “Well, Yamazaki- _sensei_ said he spoke to the people who did the scan and that everything looks fine. He thinks I’ve just got bad concussion. He was about to start stitching when he got called away. He said he’d send one of the nurses to do it.”

_Stitches. Blood. Needles._ “I’ll step out when the nurse comes, then,” Makoto said weakly. “You don’t mind, do you?”

“I don’t mind,” Haru reassured, glancing at him, a smile curling his lips. “Thanks for bringing me here, by the way.”

When another nurse entered and after greeting them, announced that she would be doing Haru’s stitches, Makoto excused himself and stepped out. He headed to the waiting room. When he arrived there, he saw Rin standing just outside the glass doors at the front of the hospital, leaning against the wall and chattering on his phone, his free hand shoved in a jacket pocket, a smile on his lips. Makoto went outside and upon seeing him, Rin straightened.

“Babe, I’ve gotta go,” he said to the person on the other end of the phone line. _Definitely his girlfriend._ “Yeah, thanks.” He chuckled. “Yeah, you too. See you.” He lowered the phone and pressed the button to end the call, then looked  - smilingly - up at Makoto. “Everything alright in there?”

“He’s getting stitches,” Makoto explained.

Rin frowned, then his eyes widened and he smirked. “Wuss,” he murmured fondly. “I’ll head in, then. Is he still in a foul mood?”

_I wouldn’t call it foul, but he’s definitely irritated._ “Maybe he’s just hungry,” Makoto ventured, glancing at the sky. It was almost dark. _If Haru vomited, he probably hasn’t got anything in him since breakfast. He must be starving._

Rin snorted. “You’re too forgiving,” he remarked. When Makoto flushed, the guy smiled and clapped him on the shoulder. “It’s not a bad thing,” he added, winking. “I’ll text you when it’s safe.” Turning, he walked back into the waiting room and after a brief chat to reception, disappeared through the inner doors.

When Rin eventually summoned him inside, Makoto found the cubicle’s curtains drawn. He peeked inside: Haru was standing beside the bed; pulling up his pants over his swimmers. There was a bandage wrapped around his head. Beside him, Rin stood leaning against the bed, watching the guy dress, his arms folded, a scowl on his face. A folded piece of paper and script rested on the end of the bed beside the discarded hospital gown. Makoto slipped in unnoticed just as Haru pulled his shirt over his head and raised a hand to feel at the bandage. When it began to slip, Makoto opened his mouth to warn him, but Rin beat him to it. 

“Hey, I said don’t fiddle with it!” the red head snapped.

Haru glanced at Rin and beyond him - to Makoto’s anxious face, then - dropping his hand - he looked quickly away, his shoulders hunching, eyes narrowing. “Stop telling me what to do.”

“Sheesh!” Rin hissed, turning his head to glare at the darkened screen of the monitor. You know, you’re my guest tonight so you could be nicer to me.”

_Wait. What?_ Makoto stared between them. _When did they decide this?_

Haru stiffened and abruptly looked back at Rin, his blue eyes wide. “I’m not staying with you,” he clipped. “I don’t care what the doctor said; I don’t need your help!”

“Well too fucking bad,” Rin snapped, turning his head to glare back at Haru. “Every time something goes wrong between us, it’s a pain because we don’t talk and we avoid each other and everything else falls apart until we fight and make up. So I’m looking after you until we figure this shit out because it’s already affecting your training and if I get more pissed off, it’s going to affect me too.”

“Well, you’re not needed because Makoto’s going to stay over,” Haru said, looking towards Makoto.

Makoto raised his hands when both Rin and Haru turned their heads to look at him, one slightly irritated but also surprised to see him standing there, the other hopeful. _I really don’t want to get involved._ He smiled weakly. _And maybe Haru staying with Rin isn’t such a bad idea. Plus both Haru’s place and my place are really small._

Rin hissed and looked back at Haru. “Makoto’s got better things to do than catch the train to yours every morning in peak hour traffic to get you up, let alone sleep over. Give the guy a break.” He paused, then added scathingly. “Sousuke’s right; you’re practically boyfriends.”

_I’m sick of being called Haru’s boyfriend._ Makoto looked past Rin to Haru. “Are we waiting on anything else?”

“No. He said I could leave,” Haru replied. “Have you eaten?”

“Yeah. But I can tag along if you guys are going out to get something,” Makoto volunteered.

“Okay,” Haru said. But at the same time, Rin said, “No need; I’m cooking at mine and Haru needs a quiet night.” Haru and Rin looked at each other for a few moments. Then Haru looked away, his expression irritated. Rin looked back at Makoto. “You should head home. You have classes tomorrow, right?”

“Yeah. Morning lectures,” Makoto agreed, but he eyed them hesitantly. There was a pause. _I really don’t mind if Haru stays over at mine or if I sleep on the floor at Haru’s, but I think it actually might be a good idea for Haru to stay with Rin. I mean, they’re actually talking… well, arguing… but it’s better than the silence and avoidance that Rin was complaining about last night, right?_

Haru was looking doubtfully at Rin.  “You don’t have a bath,” he said suddenly.

_Really, Haru?_

Rin scowled. “Oh, ‘ _Cry me a river’,_ ” he replied shortly. In English. Makoto understood the words, but he didn’t understand the reference. English wasn’t his forte, although he was far better at it than Haru, who he knew would be annoyed by Rin’s use of it. And just as predicted, across from him, Haru’s face darkened.

“I don’t _speak_ English,” the dark haired teenager snapped. Makoto stared at him. _Definitely not being silent anymore. But at this rate, he might just turn tail and run away._

“Tough shit,” Rin retorted. “Guess you’ll be up on time on the one day you’re not allowed to swim.” He straightened and picked up the paperwork at the end of the bed. “Come on, guys. Let’s get out of here.” So saying, he turned and ambled out of the cubicle and - without looking back - continued walking.

Makoto was faintly surprised when, instead of continuing to venture protests, and in spite of still looking disgruntled, Haru just quickly and quietly padded after the red head. “Haru?” he questioned, moving to fall in line with the shorter guy. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” Haru said quietly, glancing sidelong at him, then back at Rin’s back, which was a few paces ahead of them. “He just annoys me.”

“The feeling’s mutual, Mermaid,” Rin muttered from in front of them.

Makoto’s eyes widened. _Mermaid?_ He laughed before he could help himself, quickly suppressing his amusement when, in the corner of his eye, he saw the return of Haru’s scowl.


	8. Chapter 8

Anxiety that Haru and Rin might have a proper blow up overnight kept Makoto from advising Sousuke that he _would,_ actually, be free on Tuesday morning to see him before lectures. Also, reluctance to get up that early. But when he found himself suddenly awake at half 5 on Tuesday morning and unable to sleep, he got up anyway, ate a quick breakfast, sent Rin a message asking after Haru, and - in an attempt to abate his restlessness - grabbed his gym gear and made his way to the train station.

He arrived just after six and was a bit disappointed to not see Sousuke in the gym. _Ah well. Maybe he’ll show up later._ So he went over to the deserted weights area and began his usual routine. Every time he saw someone enter the gym, he glanced over, but quickly looked away when he didn’t recognise them. Occasionally, he looked at the clock: 6:30am passed. And then 6:45. And then 07:00. He finished on the weights and went over to the cardio equipment positioned further away from the door and, selecting a rowing machine, began giving his upper body and back a little more of a work out.

He was only a couple of minutes into his workout, at around 07:05, when the door opened and, looking up and through the various pieces of training equipment between him and the entrance, he saw Sousuke enter, his support strapped around his right shoulder. There was a grin on the guy’s face and after entering, he paused - turning - and held open the door for someone behind him. Looking at the tall guy behind him, Makoto almost released the handles of the rowing machine in surprise, his mouth dropping open.

It was Kisumi. And the guy was _built._ _Wow, he looks incredible. Is he taller than Sousuke?_ Makoto hadn’t seen him in anything sleeveless since middle school, having only ever seen the guy in a worse-for-wear-looking school uniform when he came to pick up Hayato after his little brother’s swim lessons. The guy had been more tall and lanky than muscular in middle school. But now…

 _Is that all from basketball?_ Makoto scanned what he could see of the guy’s body in the sleeveless black tank he was wearing. It looked similar to the one that Sousuke was wearing, actually. _They’re the same size._ Same brand, he noticed. The logo was in the same place, anyway. _That’s a bit weird._

The guys appeared deep in a pleasant conversation, both of them grinning and laughing quietly between themselves. Makoto resumed his workout, trying not to stare too obviously at them as the pair made their way to the weights area. When Sousuke nodded at another guy in the weights area and slightly turned his head towards Makoto, Makoto hurriedly dropped his gaze. _I don’t think I’ve ever seen Sousuke smile that much before._ _I wonder if they met coincidentally or if they planned to meet up after we cancelled. Rin said Sousuke mentioned that he met Kisumi at the gym… so I guess that means that Kisumi might prefer to train in the morning too._

Kisumi went over to the pull up bar and with a little jump… _Damn, he doesn’t even need to use the step_ , grabbed the overhead rail and started his workout. Makoto looked at Sousuke for the dark haired guy’s reaction and observed the guy regard Kisumi with an admiring, slightly envying look. Then, with an remark that Makoto couldn’t hear, Sousuke grinned and went to grab a bar and begin loading it with weights before moving in front of the mirror to do some upright rows. He wasn’t taking them the full way; Makoto noticed how he was stopping before bringing the bar above his shoulder height.

When Kisumi dropped down from the pull up bar after what appeared to be his last set of reps, the pink haired guy picked up his towel and water bottle, and then turned to head closer to Sousuke, saying something with a grin to the dark haired guy as he passed him to grab a bar of his own.

 _I’m too focussed on them_ , Makoto reminded himself, and turned his focus back onto his rowing technique. He worked for ten more minutes before allowing himself to look up; this time noticing that Sousuke was spotting Kisumi on the bench pressing machine. The pair weren’t talking currently. Kisumi was drenched in sweat, his face pink. Sousuke was sitting at his head, his palms hovering beneath the bar. Makoto glanced at the weight on the bar with slight mortification. _I think I’d be embarrassed to train with Sousuke, actually. And I need to focus on my own training._

He did another ten minutes and then finally, just after 07:30, rose and went over to the mat area even further away from the weights area to do some body weight exercises, crunches, and his stretches. Then, at 08:05 he headed to the showers to wash up. He half expected to be noticed by either Kisumi or Sousuke, but given the guys were focussed intently on their training and had resumed their cheerful chattering on the other side of the gym room, it didn’t really surprise him.

_Although… is it rude of me not to have gone over to say hello? Especially as Sousuke will probably come in here to wash up soon and see me._

He headed into the shower, stripped off, slung his green towel over the tiled wall parallel to the showers, and turned on the faucet. There was one other person in the bathroom, but he heard them leave when he was under the shower. He sighed and began soaping himself over. _I hope he doesn’t come in whilst I’m here._

And then, just as that hopeful thought entered his mind, he heard someone else pad into the room. Makoto nervously glanced behind him, but he couldn’t see beyond the tiled wall that lined the series of open showers. He frowned and hurriedly began rinsing off the soap.

“Oi, Makoto!”

Startled, he turned to stare at Sousuke, who was standing at the end of the line of showers, a dark grey towel held in front of his groin, eyeing him in confusion. He was holding a small bottle of what appeared to be soap in his other hand.

“Yo! I thought you weren’t coming,” Sousuke said, padding towards him, a frown entering his face. “Why didn’t you come over to say ‘hi’?”

 _Damn. So he_ had _been spotted._ Makoto flushed. “I…” _I should say hello too._ “H-Hey! Rin stayed with Haru and… and you and Kisumi looked busy and I didn’t want to disturb you both,” he stammered. And then he realised that he wasn’t even looking at Sousuke’s face anymore, but staring at the tightly drawn definition of his hairless chest and abdomen. _I… I can see his hips… and his V-line. And he either shaves or waxes._ His mouth was dry. He didn’t know where to look either. And his body was responding too! He clapped a hand over his groin and glanced mournfully towards his towel, which was hanging over the tiled wall, just far enough away for reaching to look like a forced movement.

Sousuke’s eyes narrowed slightly and they flicked up and down his body briefly, but if the guy noticed anything weird, he didn’t say anything. Instead, he approached and, slinging his own towel over the wall beside Makoto’s green one, he moved closer and turned on the faucet of the shower head _right next_ to him.

Makoto dumbly watched the guy step under the shower head, no care for the initial temperature, and after adjusting the faucet slightly, opened the soap bottle and poured a little onto his hands. The water wove down his back and front in rivulets, making the tributaries between his muscles even starker. Makoto’s gaze drifted down, down… watching bubbles joining the descent of the water past the guy’s navel and down that V-line to the trimmed thatch of dark hair to… _Fuck, he’s really big._ His swimmers definitely _must_ have been compression. He watched Sousuke’s hands slide down his body to run over his penis and balls and cover them in suds, before drifting back upwards. Makoto knew he should look away, but the soap bubbles were just… resting there…

“Fuck, man, not that I’m not flattered, but how long are you going to gawp at my junk?” Sousuke remarked suddenly, his tone gruff. Makoto swallowed… _Fuck_! …and lifted his gaze to stare wide eyed at the other guy’s hooded… and slightly critical gaze.

“I’m… sorr…”

“Jeez!” Sousuke swore, scowling, “What have I told you about doing that?” He turned his head and looked across the room at the clock on the wall. On following his gaze, Makoto saw that it was 08:16. Then, when in the periphery of his vision he saw Sousuke suddenly looming towards him, he looked back, only to freeze in surprise when the guy grasped him by his shoulders and, pressing him back against the wall of the shower and beyond the spray of the water, kissed him. Right on the mouth.

It was more of a peck than anything, and when Sousuke drew back, the guy was still scowling at him. “Hey, open your lips,” he said quietly.

“I… I…” Makoto didn’t know what to say. _Even if we’re behind a wall, we’re in a public bathroom. Anyone could walk in!_ His body felt strange, like it was on fire, and Sousuke’s hands had somehow ended up on his hips. The guy was pressing against him, his erection hot and heavy against the back of Makoto’s hand, which was still covering his own erection. “Wait…” But then Sousuke dived in whilst his mouth was open and kissed him again, this time not pulling away. Makoto could hear his heart racing in his ears and their panting loud in the quiet of the bathroom.

Sousuke pushed at Makoto’s modesty hand, and when it didn’t immediately budge, he broke his kiss to shift his mouth to Makoto’s ear. “Move… your hand. I want to touch you.”

“We’ll be late,” Makoto protested.

A soft snicker. “ _That’s_ your concern? You’ll be able to concentrate if I leave you like this?”

 _He’s so mean!_ “You’re the same!” he protested.

Another push at his hand. “So you’ll deny both of us?” Sousuke whispered against his ear. Makoto shivered. His knees felt weak. “So you _can_ be a bastard.”

“I’m _not_!” _It’s just common sense._ But Makoto relented and shifted his hand, only to gasp, cringing, when Sousuke immediately wrapped his left hand around his erection and began stroking him. He grabbed at the guy’s free arm… _Wait, that’s his injured arm_ … Legs trembling, he looked for somewhere to hold for support… _I should probably touch him_ …and clasped Sousuke’s damp waist, the water making the guy’s skin slippery. His gaze dropped further. _Wait, he’s using his left hand. And I’m right handed… We’ll be in the way._

“I’m right handed,” he whispered.

Sousuke snorted - the sound amused - and, without breaking his pace, he rolled his hips and collected his own erection in his palm together with Makoto’s. His other hand, he reached out to press against the wall by Makoto’s head. _Oh fuck. He really knows how to do this._ Makoto stared down at the sight, of the leaking head of his own erection, and the slightly larger one rubbing against it. The sheer sight made a tightness pull up within his balls and his hand tightened on Sousuke’s waist.

“I’m going to cum,” he warned.

A snicker. “I think… that’s the point,” Sousuke huffed. “Idiot.” _So mean!_ There was a faint flush on the guy’s cheeks. And with a final hard upwards stroke and pressure against the tip, Makoto felt himself shudder and tip over. He whimpered as he came, his hands clenching on Sousuke’s waist. He felt another hot splash strike against his abdomen… not from him… and he realised that Sousuke had cum too.

Panting, dazed, he stared at the other guy as Sousuke released him - pushing him slightly - so that Makoto was leaned back against the wall, and stepped a pace back so that he was under the water. _What the hell just happened?_ Sousuke was breathing hard, his face slack, his gaze still fixed downwards, though no longer on Makoto but on the shower floor. His dark hair was plastered to his head. Makoto felt an ache in his chest. He wanted to touch him, but he felt boneless. So he stayed against the wall, his arms limp at his sides.

And then with a deep inhalation, Sousuke raised his eyes to regard him, a small smirk on his lips. He winked, and then - turning - collected his towel from the wall, slung it over his shoulder, and padded away.


End file.
